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Thoughts on my friend Roland

Dalrock
July 15, 2010

In my second year of college my father bought a house for me to stay in (with roommates) with the idea of keeping it as an investment property later.  I drove up from out of state a week or so early to check the place out and do the minor plumbing repairs we knew had to be done.

Roland was one of my next door neighbors.  He was in his 70s and not very strong, but Roland had a fantastic attitude and a great deal of wisdom to share with a young man.  He couldn’t crawl under the house, turn a wrench, or hold a pipe for me; but he talked me through every challenge I came across.  After I finished the plumbing, he helped me replace the wheel bearings and grease seals on my old pickup truck in the same way.  He cheerfully pulled up a lawn chair on my driveway and walked me through the whole process.

To return the favor I helped him with a number of tasks he wasn’t able to complete himself.  I held up his garage door motor while his friend bolted it into the ceiling, and I took him to Sears to pick up the snowblower he had bought so he didn’t have to carry it.  This was a perfect partnership.  Older wiser man willing to teach, younger stronger man eager to learn.  I probably don’t have to mention that he was like a father to me.

Roland’s wife was understandably protective of him and anxious to ensure that he didn’t strain himself, so I didn’t get to spend as much time with him as I otherwise would have.  I’m sure we both had more projects which would have been perfect to tackle together.  But Roland had been diagnosed with stomach cancer and only had a few months left.

Knowing this his projects came into an entirely new light.  He had lived there for 30 years and never felt the need for a snow blower or garage door opener.  He was old school, and these kind of conveniences didn’t fit his view of what a man should be.  These items weren’t for him, but for his wife after he passed.  When he mentioned this I could see that her well being was all he could focus on.  Obviously Roland had much more to teach this young man than a few tips on plumbing or car repair.

Once the semester started I didn’t have the same amount of time to spend with Roland on projects, and shortly thereafter his health got worse so he wasn’t able to any way.  I wanted to visit with him but his wife always wanted to let him rest, and I didn’t push the issue.  Roland passed when I was away on Christmas break.  The garage door opener was very helpful to his widow, but I doubt the snowblower ever made it out of the box.  I made it a point to shovel her sidewalk whenever the man who lived on the other side of her didn’t beat me to it.

I see a lot of discussion in the manosphere about alpha this or beta that, but in my mind Roland was the epitome of manliness.  I’ve been thinking about him all afternoon and felt the need to write something up on him.  And thank him for all that he taught me.

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Post Information
Title Thoughts on my friend Roland
Author Dalrock
Date July 15, 2010 9:08 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Blog Dalrock
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/blog/Dalrock/thoughts-on-my-friendroland.12470
https://theredarchive.com/blog/12470
Original Link https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2010/07/15/thoughts-on-my-friend-roland/
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