Our Resident HAP FeministX muses on the question of paying for dates:
“Dutch on Dates
Apparently the decision to split the bill on a date is the cause of some controversy, at least on the internet. I find this discussion odd because the issue does not seem to apply to my life. I’ve been on many first dates with men of all kinds of income levels, ethnicities and ideological leanings, and with only one exception, the guy was fairly insistent about paying for the first date. In all of my long term relationships, the guy payed at least 75% of the time. I generally offer to pay my share unless I have no interest in seeing the guy again, in which case I don’t offer to pay because I want to fine the guy for annoying me with his company. What I find interesting is that sometimes (rarely) I can’t get a second date out of a guy, but that never stops them for paying for the first date.
A couple of my friends tell me that they keep going on dates with guys that want to split the bill. They don’t disqualify a guy because he wants to go dutch, but they prefer men that pay. One of my friends thinks it’s a sign of a good upbringing. I’ve been curious about why I never encounter the paying for dates issue while others apparently do. I wonder if it’s because I purposely seek out dominant men who are perhaps more in tune with their traditional gender role. I also wonder if its because I’m above average looking.”
OK, this post is just loaded with all kinds of stuff that scream to be addressed. First off, yup, FemX’s liking for more traditional guys, coupled with her attractiveness, can account for her personal experiences. However, we have to keep in mind that lots of guys are still woefully in the dark about these sort of matters, AND WOMEN KNOW THIS. Trust me, they ain’t stupid. They know that they benefit in a big way if they can get you to kickout considerable hard currency upfront while they enjoy the fruits of your labor…all the while not putting out in the least.
Simply put, and especially in these days and times where guys are losing their gigs left and right and more Women are making more money that Men, a guy is an A1 Fool if he goes all out on a First Date. Not only is he signalling DLV, but he also screams out “I’m So Needy/Horny!” and trust me, that does NOT turn a Woman on, in the least.
Personally speaking, my standard operating procedure is to arrange for a light, quick and *cheap*, First Date-always at a cafe’. Always in the daytime. And always no more than $20 spent. This way, if things go south-and they often do-I can take a $20 hit and a loss of roughly an hour of my time. Of course, if things go well, all the better, and the pressure is off both sides for a “performance” of some kind. The Cafe’ Date also acts as a kind of interview-your chance to see what she’s all about mentally, emotionally, etc. Of course, she gets to check you out in that way, too.
Now for me, I only pay for dates etc, when we have fully established an *ongoing sexual relationship*, which means for me, that I have to basically tap dat azz three times on separate occasions, plus what I call a “Security Shot”. This ensures that she has sufficiently bonded to me, Body & Soul, she has offered her womb up to me way more than once, she is mine exclusively and that I now have a rightful claim to and on her, and then-and only then-do I now begin to invest my resources on her. She’s earned that right. In no way am I a stingy guy or anything like that, but it is very important to keep in mind that there are Women out there who get off bigtime on getting guys to spend their loot w/absolutely no intention whatsoever of reciprocating. Personally, I enjoy dealing with such Women, because I make it so they have a very difficult time disengaging with me, even all the while knowing that I wouldn’t give them the sweat off my balls, they’re so ungrateful. Thankfully, in my life experience at least, these Women are few and far between, usually at the bars and clubs, where they routinely go for ego validation from the AFCs of the world.
Poor bastards.
Anyway, handling the FemX’s of the world is very, very easy to do. They come a lot cheaper than they let on.
Trust me.
Holla back
The Obsidian
