Men are resorting to increasingly desperate measures to protect themselves from the huge risks inherent in marriage. Prenups have exploded in popularity, and despite Tiger Woods’ recent cop-out and capitulation, are proving effective. Men are becoming more discerning when it comes to choosing a wife, which probably goes a good ways toward explaining the rise in illegitimacy rates — many women are having to resort to tricking men into impregnating them out of wedlock to have children at all. Society is awakening to the fact that women are far from the morally unimpeachable angels that white knighting old fools fantasize about. However, none of this is enough. Given the miserable state of millions of divorced men, it is obvious that men need a lot more.
One thing that could definitely gain some traction is marital insurance. People have always sought out health and life insurance, because everyone knows that a disaster or accident could strike from out of the blue, cutting down young or old, healthy or sick and rich or poor alike. It’s just a fact of life that adults accept. But what about divorce? This catastrophe is far more likely to cut a man down in the prime of life than cancer, a serious car accident, or even falling and breaking a leg on an icy sidewalk. A wife can go from calculated pleasantries to blitzkrieg divorce war while a man is at work, entirely unaware of her scheme, and he can come home to flashing lights, armed men and an order to collect his “personal belongings” and immediately leave and stay at least one mile away from his home and family.
In these cases, far too many men are left with no help, no options, and literally nowhere to sleep. No man is safe; I have heard from policemen who were forced to sleep at the station because their wives had seized their bank accounts and obtained orders throwing them out of the house. Many men must sleep in their cars, and others in their offices if they are lucky. There are no shelters for these men. In fact, the only shelter always open to them is jail, because they are commonly labeled “perpetrators” whether or not they have been convicted of crimes.
An innovative solution to the acute crisis of marital separation is an insurance policy to cover the short-term costs in such an event. A man with marital insurance, upon being ordered out of his house and thrown into the cold, unforgiving night, could obtain temporary lodging pending finding a new place to live, funds for food and gas, and enough money to pay a retainer to a good family law attorney. More comprehensive forms of marital insurance could include counseling, private investigator services, and temporary backup for any bank accounts seized or liquidated by the wife.
Not being an attorney, I’m not sure exactly what the laws are surrounding such forms of insurance, but in a search I found that a number of patent applications have already been filed for marriage insurance. Obviously, I’m neither the first nor the only one who has thought of it, and people are apparently taking the idea seriously.
In addition to protecting men in the event of a sudden divorce, divorce insurance could prevent a number of men from making the wrong choice in the first place. Just as an insurance rate varies according to the value of the asset and risks involved, a method could be developed to calculate which women are good bets and which ones are not. The more statistically likely a woman would be to divorce, the higher the insurance rate. Knowing how much a wife would cost to insure could give men a much better idea of whether marrying her is a good idea or not. If, for example, a young female intern in a family law firm cost, say, $500/month to insure, many men might opt for a new car instead of marriage and save themselves from a future catastrophe.
Complicated times call for extraordinary measures, and this might be one that could tide over men until we can finally do away with the current mess and try something better.
