As I’ve alluded to a few times over the past few months, I’m in the middle of yet more custody litigation. My ex wants to move my kids to Canada, and this being Washington state, where there is a presumptive approval of relocation, she’ll probably get her way. Online, I’ve remained fairly tight-lipped about it, because making an issue of the details would probably have negative consequences for me in court. However, I’ve been putting a lot of work into the latest round of litigation, because it will determine my relationship with my kids for the next 12 years or so. The implications will be permanent, obviously, but not necessarily disastrous.
I’d really like to give readers a taste of what’s going on, but I’ve been advised to wait until the pleadings have been put on the record. So, it’s going to take at least a few weeks before I can publish anything from the court, but I will definitely do so when the time is right. I have always thought it was a tasteless to publish one’s personal travails, but given the state of family law I’m starting to see it as a duty. I was so thoroughly smeared in my divorce that I stopped caring what people said about me or thought of me, and that has a lot to do with this site’s existence.
However, there have been some recent cases in which men have been unconstitutionally ordered by judges to take down websites when they criticized judges’ decisions, and I can’t afford such an order until I am legally in the clear. Nevertheless, there will come a time, and that time is soon, when I can voice my own opinion without fear of censure about what happens to non-custodial fathers in a typical courtroom.
The last thing I want to do is air dirty laundry, but given the way fathers are treated this is very much a public issue. When the rulings come in, I will go ahead and publish them, so men who are thinking about marriage or facing divorce can have an idea of how this works. Additionally, I’ll be perfectly happy to offer my own opinion on what the commissioner decides.
I’ve come to the conclusion that until men are willing to take these deeply painful personal experiences to the public, those who perpetuate the injustice will feel that they are operating in a climate of impunity. I’d like to play some part in changing this sense of security on the part of our black-robed would-be gods. It’s time for the courts to be held accountable.
