It’s in the Bible!

Readership: All
Author’s Note: This post expands an earlier comment and is coauthored with Jack.
Length: 1,100 words
Reading Time: 4 minutes

Jesus was Self-Confident

Here’s what we know about Christ’s relationships with women: He had a few in his life. He loved them. He cared for them. He showed compassion for them. When he saw friends weeping over Lazarus’ death, he wept with them (and then He took care of business). But – he never submitted to any of them – not even to His own mother, the venerated Mary.

Jesus exercised absolute lordship over women. He never let a woman tell Him what to do or what He should have done. Remember Mary and Martha:

  1. Martha telling Jesus “Hey Jesus! I’m busy in here! Tell my sister Mary to get in here and help me!” Jesus rebuked her gently and corrected her: “Martha, you worry about so many things, But Mary has chosen what is most needful.”
  2. Mary and Martha urgently sending for Jesus when their brother Lazarus was sick. “Jesus, come now.” He waited 2 days and let Lazarus die. So when he got there, the very first thing Martha says is “Well, hell, Jesus. If you’d been here when I asked you to come, Lazarus wouldn’t have died!” (and then she checks herself…) “but I know that if it’s Your will, Lazarus will live.”

He was always in charge with and around them. He told women what to do and they did it. His own mother at the wedding said, “Jesus, they’re out of wine.” Jesus told her: “Woman, this has nothing to do with Me.  It’s not My time yet.” Mary then said to the servants: “Do whatever He tells you.”

He didn’t take women seriously. He told women who’s who and what’s what:

  1. The woman with five husbands – he showed her compassion but firmly rebuked her.
  2. The woman caught in adultery – he was compassionate with her, but then told her to “go, and sin no more”.
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Jesus, Lord of Frame

Jesus was the undisputed master of the reframe. Every time someone said something, Jesus’ response was a paraphrase of “I reject your frame and substitute My own perfect one.” or “Here’s My frame. You need to get with My program.”

No one could “gotcha” Jesus, though they tried.

Pharisees: “Which is the greatest commandment?”
Jesus: “I see what you’re trying to do there. Here’s everything: Love the Lord with all you’ve got; love your neighbor as yourself. There. That sums up the Law and the prophets.”

Pharisees: “Hey. We saw You healing at the temple on the Sabbath. That’s work, and You’re not supposed to be working on the Sabbath!  Hypocrite!  False prophet!”
Jesus: “My Father has been working until now, and so I am working.”

Jesus Tested Women

Western churchianity is loathe to point this out, but Jesus took women to task, and made sure they were worthy of what they asked of Him, and were ready to receive with thankfulness. He did this as a regular matter.

Take for example, the woman with the demon possessed daughter.

Woman: “Jesus, heal my daughter!” (Christ ignores her and says nothing.)
Disciples: “Lord, send her away, she’s annoying us.”
Jesus: I was sent only for Israel’s lost sheep.
Woman: (kneels before Jesus) “Lord, help me!”
Jesus: “It is not right to take children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.”
Woman: “Yes, Lord, but even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their master’s table.” 
Jesus: “Woman, you have great faith! Your daughter is healed.”

Another example of Jesus “testing” women was his exchange with the woman with the issue of blood:

Jesus was moving through a crowd. A woman who has been bleeding for 12 years, sees Him and thinks, “If I can just get close and touch Him, I’ll be healed.” She came up behind Jesus and touched the fringe of His clothes, and was healed immediately. He said, “Who touched Me? I perceive that power has gone out of Me.” She was afraid, but knelt before him and said (paraphrasing), “I did, because I’d heard about Your power and You healing people just by touching them, and I figured if I could just touch You I could get healed.” Jesus replied, “Daughter, your faith has made you well.  Go in peace.”

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That’s a woman knowing what the test is and passing with flying colors. The test is “Do it My way, get with My program, step into My frame.” She did it His way: Believe, step out in faith, and act on that faith. She submitted to him, visibly: She knelt in front of Him and explained what she did and why. He recognized her and told her she passed the test, and was rewarded for it with healing and being called “Daughter”.

Epilogue

Did Jesus have sex with women? We do not know whether He did or not. We take it on faith that He did not because we have no record of His taking a wife and Scripture is silent on it. Tradition says He neither married nor had “carnal” knowledge. There is a gap in descriptions of His early life between ages 12 and when He began public ministry at 30. We know – we take it on faith – He was, and is, the perfect Man, the God-Man.

Christ lived out the perfect example of masculinity, including His masculinity in relationship to women.

  • You love, care for, and trust, the women closest to you; all others can pound sand.
  • You decide which women you love, care for, and trust by testing them.
  • You make them prove their worthiness of your love, care, and trust. When they pass the tests, then you love, care for, and trust them. At that point, it’s about lordship. Control. Mastery. Firm and gentle rebuke.
  • Women don’t run you or your life.
  • Women don’t tell you what to do; you tell them what to do.
  • You come when you decide it’s time.
  • You go where you decide to go, when you decide to go.
  • You do what you decide needs to be done for the greater good and for the purposes you have deemed necessary and proper.

Women you don’t love, care for or trust – who cares about them or what they do? Until they pass the tests, you’re indifferent to them. You don’t tell them anything, help them, do anything for them, or give them any mental or emotional effort whatsoever. You have nothing whatsoever to do with them. You keep them out of your life.

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