Let’s look at a tweet from a conservative Christian pro-marriage activist named Katy Faust. Katy is a very conservative Christian who advocates for marriage and parenting. She recently tweeted her view that Elon Musk is a polygamist, because he is accused of having consensual recreational sex with a 26-year-old woman. Is Katy right to accuse Elon Musk of “polygamy”?

Here is her tweet.

And it says:

Elon is a modern day #polygamist- a family structure characterized by jealousy & inequality.

“Musk has never asked to see the baby, nor asked for photos of him”

St. Clair [asked] to meet “Hmm ok,” EM responds, “Well, I do have a legion of kids to make.”

And she links to this article in the New York Post, which clearly explains why this is not “polygamy”, it’s just premarital sex between an adult female and a wealthy non-Christian man.

In general, pro-marriage conservatives tell women like Ashley St. Clair two things:

  1. When a man and a woman have recreational premarital sex, only the man is to blame. The woman didn’t do anything wrong.
  2. A women should expect that premarital sex with a non-Christian man who has many babies with many other women will cause that man to convert to Christianity and marry her.

So, what happens when tall, hot, wealthy high-status bad boys like Elon Musk don’t comply with the message that pro-marriage conservatives tell young women? Well, then they ignore the woman’s own choices, and only shame and blame the man. “Why isn’t this bad man behaving like a good man?!” they cry.

This attitude that women should be free to follow their hearts, and men must be forced to pay for her choices is EVERYWHERE in our society. It’s in student loan bailouts, it’s in single mother welfare, it’s in the family courts. As I blogged previously, men receive much longer prison sentences than women for the same crimes. Men are just walking ATMs, and whenever women do something that doesn’t work, it’s ALWAYS a man’s fault, and men must ALWAYS pay the costs.

And this view is very popular. When I say popular, I think this is the majority view among Christian women and Christian pastors. They think that the main teaching of Christianity is just that men ought to transfer all their money to women after having premarital sex. That’s it. And they call this “servant leadership”. Women lead the relationship, and men just give them money,. Just like an ATM. And the entire family court system reflects this view – if a man disappoints a woman in any way, then she should just take half his stuff, and he should have to pay her alimony and child support forever. In fact, you don’t even have to get married. And you don’t even have to cohabitate. The courts will transfer the money.

How will men respond to this? Well, here is how they respond. The top 20% of the most attractive, wealthy and high status men will continue to be pursued by hordes of women like this 26-year-old woman, and these men will continue to get free sex with no commitment from these women. These men have options. They don’t need to commit to get sex. The line for them is around the block. The line is over the river and through the woods. 80% of women are chasing the top 20% of men. Far from finding non-Christian man-sluts repulsive, most women are attracted to their “dark triad” traits. And the pro-marriage conservatives just let these women follow their hearts. Then they turn to the bad men and try to shame them for being exactly what they are: BAD. “You bad man! How could you be bad?” they cry. They make the shocked pikachu face. And women watching get the message: keep chasing the tall, hot bad boys, nobody is ever going to hold us accountable for our bad choices. This is where abortion, fatherlessness and frivolous divorce come from, by the way.

Meanwhile, the bottom 80% of ordinary men, will continue to be invisible to these women… until these women hit 35-40. Then the aging women will ask “where are all the good men?” And then the pro-marriage conservatives will be right there, to point at the formerly-invisible men and say “you boring, stable men! You have to marry this single mother, who thinks she is settling for someone far beneath her because she once has sex with Elon Musk!”. And those men are going to say – and they are saying it now – “I DECLINE TO PARTICIPATE”. And then the pro-marriage conservatives will write articles to shame those men, but those men aren’t going to be shamed into becoming slaves. Not when they are just coming into their highest-earning years, and without any help from women.

So, who is responsible for the decline of marriage? Contrary to popular belief, it is not men. It is the pro-marriage conservatives. They are the ones who are clearly communicating to young women that is fine to chase premarital sex with tall, hot, wealthy, high-status bad boys. And they tell them to keep expecting these non-Christian man-sluts to suddenly change into Christians and commit, after they get premarital sex. It’s the pro-marriage conservatives who are setting false expectations of what happens after sex.

And this view that women must be left free to “follow their hearts” is everywhere in society. Women live in New York City, travel to Europe, and run up student loans for worthless non-STEM degrees. Women must have recreational sex in their 20s and 30s, delay marriage for career, and throw their fatherless kids into daycare. Or abort them. Oh yes, the pro-life conservatives only blame the tall, hot, non-Christian bad boys for abortion. Abortion is never the woman’s fault, because it was totally reasonable for her to expect the non-Christian man would convert to Christianity, marry her, give her all his money, and then transform into Prince Charming – right after she gives him recreational sex.

This is why the invisible good men are declining to date and marry. It’s the lies that pro-marriage conservatives tell young women. Lies that are reflected in our schools, workplaces, police, and courts. Good men know never to be the man that a leftover woman “settles” for, after her fun with the bad boys who she is actually attracted to. They know that they will bear the costs, when she inevitably divorces him. And that’s why the marriage rate is dropping.