Sometimes you meet someone and the connection is instant and special. But there’s a problem, your sex drive is clearly mismatched, or even worse they have serious sexual issues that impede the relationship advancing.
It’s not your job in a dating relationship to cure their sexual dysfunction.
I had a serious relationship in college that honestly stayed at nothing more than a friendship level. She had a few issues going on and despite my enormous attraction I held back from dating her, but we hung out all the time. Studying in the library everyday, lunch everyday, coffee, church. I just waited for her to get a bit more together before pushing for the relationship I actually wanted. And I waited, and waited and waited…
One day we had started discussing sex and the frequency of sexual impulse and horniness came up.
Me: “About five or six times”
She: “I dunno once or twice”.
We just stood there looking at each other, waiting…
Me: “…a day”.
She: “…a month”.
Me: “Really?”
She: “Really.”
Bearing in mind that this was back in my Evangelical Christian period, I never considered her again as a possible relationship. All done sorry, you are not the wife I am looking for. I’ve never really figured out if she just wasn’t interested in me, or couldn’t really be interested in anyone anyway. I just sure as hell wasn’t wasting my one shot at sexual happiness on her. Later I met Jennifer and my friend was fairly useful as life support for me getting through the hell of long distance without Jennifer.
Actually looking back it was all very complicated. She was on the short list to be the If I Didn’t Have Jennifer I Would Probably Have Somebody Else. My choice in wife was the right one, but I couldn’t have made it to the end without her help. But if she had made a move on me I would have folded and failed. It’s humbling. It was a hard lonely time and I have no taste for time apart from Jennifer.
So anyway… if you are romantically involved someone with sexual issues, marrying them isn’t a cure for it. All that happens is that you win a sexual problem too.
I have tried to look up my old friend a few times but not found her. I hope she’s ok. She may not be.
Related posts:
- Cock Killing Medication: Persistent SSRI Sexual Dysfunction One of the most important things in having a wonderful...
- The Betaization Cure: Do Stuff That You Like For A Change There’s a lot going on when you’re married with kids....
- Follow Up: Vasectomy Causing Loss Of Wife’s Sexual Interest? A couple months back I wrote a post where I...
- Vasectomy Causing Loss Of Wife’s Sexual Interest? Reader Question; “Does a vasectomy null the effects of the...
