If You Want A Personal Fuck Toy You Have To Be Willing To Be An Asshole

One of the primary insights of the Game viewpoint – and truthfully this is just basic behavioral analysis rather than specific to Game – is not that you stop listening to women, but that you pay attention to their actions as their actual message.

For example imagine if a mom is in a grocery store and with a toddler asking for candy. The mom says “no” and the toddler starts crying, the mom says “no” again and the crying gets louder and louder until finally the mom relents and buys candy. The verbal message here is “no candy”, but the actual message from her actions is “if you cry I will give you candy“. As a result the kid throws a fit for candy every time they go to the grocery store. If she just calmly listens to the tears and leaves the store, the kid has to follow or be left behind. The message then is “no candy and crying doesn’t work”.

Unfortunately most men are dumber than toddlers when it comes to women. Usually when a man hears a woman say “I just want to meet a nice guy, why can’t I meet a nice guy”, he actually believes that she wants to meet a nice guy. So he becomes a nice guy to try and attract and please her. When she starts dating another asshole similar to the last guy she complained about, the nice guy is confused and hurt. (That was a basic summary of my dating life before Jennifer.)

Thus the Game insight “stop listening to what women say and start paying attention to what they do” is a brilliant thought to most men. Very frequently women say they want a “sweet kind nice man”, but then they repeatedly date someone considerably harsher in personality. The real message is “I am attracted to strong men”. Or probably more correctly, “I am attracted to strong men but I want them to be nice to just me and not dump me for someone else”.

Once men get that basic understanding that modeling interpersonal strength attracts women and they start putting it into practice, they are almost always absolutely stunned at how much more women pay them attention. In truth women can poo-poo this point as much as they like, all a man has to do is take it for a whirl for six months and they will become a convert.

For the most part the social dominance resulting from Game is fairly simple, it’s not about making the woman do anything or controlling her at all, it’s about making her replaceable by another woman. The correct frame is that a woman doesn’t have to do anything for you at all. If she wants to be with you she can, if she wants to have sex with you she can, if she wants to play house and raise your kids she can. But if she doesn’t want to do any of that, there’s another woman (or women) waiting in the wings that would. The essence of Game is giving yourself options. If your Saturday is a decision between Cheryl, Susan or Julie you’re going to get laid, maybe twice. Obviously this can make a wife extremely nervous and naturally Game will be viewed with great suspicion because it advantages the husband. There doesn’t even have to be an actual woman waiting in the wings like an understudy quietly poisoning the leading lady. Just the skill set available to replace the leading lady with minimal inconvenience.

Game isn’t about making a woman do something. It’s about her missing out on you if she doesn’t.

One of the primary premises of this blog is that you can’t actually change the other spouse. I can’t actually control or make Jennifer do anything she doesn’t want to. I can only control my behavior and have that be something she responds to.

Thanks to Feminism I learned a lot of supposedly female skills over the years, so now the only thing I really need from a woman is sex. I can cook, clean, raise kids, shop, deal with illness, decorate, pay bills, make friends and entertain myself yada yada yada. Or hire people to do that for me. So the criteria for Jennifer hanging with me is that I get copious sex or I walk and find someone else that will. And I would. She knows I would. I know that she knows I would. And she knows that I know that she knows I would. Hence she becomes my personal fuck toy. (In editing the post Jennifer requested a T-Shirt with “Athol’s Personal Fuck Toy” on it. At least I know what to get her for Christmas now). And once a woman is your personal fuck toy, you pretty much can get away with anything outside the bedroom. And yes, that does make me an asshole. Or at the very least, her personal asshole that is nice to her and not dumping her for anyone else.

If she’s sick, exhausted or whatever and can’t have sex, I totally get that. I’ve supported her through a number of medical incidents over the years where I just loved her, cared for her, held down the fort and jerked off for several months. I just have zero tolerance for being married to someone and not having a sex life for any proper reason. Sex is why I married. Married Man = Sex Life. I am an asshole about this, but I’m an easily understandable asshole. I really did explain this clearly before I married her.

I also can’t stand dumbass people that need to be saved from themselves. That’s a criteria as well. Thankfully Jennifer is a bright woman and has great common sense. I have enough stuff to do in my own day to worry about micromanaging someone else’s. I also want to be with someone that’s basically pleasant and enjoyable to be with. Jennifer is sweet and fun. So check on that one too.

She’s a living breathing wonderful woman that I am devoted to and still in love with.

On the flip side, Jennifer has her own criteria too. I think one is exactly the same as my dumbass one, so that’s no problem. Well, usually anyway lol. There’s another one that’s basically “you have to be nice to me and the girls and help out, or I will get quite unhappy”. This one is not hard really and matches my “you gotta be pleasant” criteria as well so no problem either. We really are nice to each other.

Her other criteria is that if I get sex from anywhere else, she will walk. I haven’t actually tested on this one yet. Obviously I wouldn’t mind some extra candy… but she’s quite good with managing toddlers.