Letting the cat grab the string

An interesting exchange occurred between Thursday and Talleyrand on this Alkibiades post. The transcript:

Thursday: You will never pass every shit test or win every frame war. In fact, to do so would make you look inhuman.

Talleyrand: I am o.k. with being inhuman.

Th: It actually makes you less attractive.

Ta: The only way to know that is if you have passed every shit test, which you just indicated can never be done.

Th: I was talking with a prominent PUA instructor here in Canada and he told me that beyond a certain point, passing shit tests is useless and as you approach passing them all (you can’t actually pass them all) you tend to come off as less attractive.

Ta: Interesting. I wonder if it either makes the man seem to high status, or if it makes the female mind on some level think that she can not ultimately suck the life out of the man and conquer him.

Thursday is onto something here.

Imagine playing with a cat by dangling a bit of string in front of its face and yanking it away every time it tries to grab it. How will this play out? For a while, the cat will play along, lunging for the string after you pull it away again and again. If you go too long, though, the cat will realize the futility of its position, get bored, and wander off. Similarly, imagine playing a video game that is physically impossible to win. Why bother? Toss the controller down and go do something more productive, like bashing your head into a brick wall.

Women are wired to play games with us. Shit testing is one type of game. Naturally, you don’t want to fail shit tests, because your girl will lose attraction to you if you do. However, anyone who plays a game plays to win. Lose too many times and they’ll throw their hands up and walk away. Similarly, I hypothesize that passing too many shit tests causes the woman to lose attraction because she slowly realizes there’s no hope of taming her man. Like the cat sick of trying to grab a string it can never get, she tires of losing and leaves. Perhaps intentionally failing the occasional shit test is the key to making an LTR last.

Dave from Hawaii, the undisputed master of LTR game, offers some some last words:

You can’t pass ‘em all….but pass enough of ‘em and they become much less frequent.

And if you do fail one and she gets irritated and starts acting bitchy, just respond with total indifference…or rachet up some asshole game.

One of the things I used to always do was read her expressions and body language and always ask her “what’s wrong? Why are you upset? Are you mad at me?”

Now…I ignore every upset or perturbed expression she makes. I literally project an “I don’t care that your mad” attitude.

Since adopting this mindset, she has never been angry at me for more than a few minutes…whereas when I catered to her emotional state, I could have her mad at me for days.

Now she asks me if I’m mad, or what’s wrong.