I was reading an interview with hedge fund manager Paul Tudor Jones recently. At 60, his networth is more than $4 billion. He’s a self-made man in every sense of the world.

Paul started out as a runner for a brokerage house, learned the ropes of the financial markets and began trading his own money. He got rich, bored and lonely, so applied and was accepted into Harvard Business School. Then at the last minute he decided not to bother. He hired a couple of people and started a hedge fund. By the mid 80s he had some millions under management and caught the 1987 crash, banking a mint for himself and his investors. The rest is history.

Paul also established the Robin Hood Foundation that gives out hundreds of millions of dollars to help under-privileged children (his last fundraiser banked $60M). Yet he cites his wife and kids as his greatest achievement. Matthew McConaughey pictured above is another family man, who even credits the family support for a part of his success.

A man who says something like this is either lying to cover up his other failures, is pussy whipped, or is genuinely accomplished and thus feels the warm glow of success is best represented not by money or fame, but by his own family unit; an admirable if somewhat secondary goal. An Oscar winning actor and an aggressive futures trader who can be seen in the 80s documentary ‘Trader’ screaming orders into the phone and losing a quick $6M in day (whilst wearing his lucky Bruce Willis sneakers) falls into the latter category and it’s interesting to hear men who have accomplished so much qualify themselves by family.

Most certainly a man would not be able to say that had he married some awful whore who divorce raped him. Tudor Jones mentions that he’ll pull money from his sub-managers that are having relationship problems because they perform poorly. He seems to have quite an old school ‘red pill’ attitude.

Having been on both sides of the equation, both single and attached, I’ll give you a few pointers I’ve learned both through my own successes and failures. Whilst the crop of women in their teens and twenties might be more damaged than previous generations, I’m sure it’s still possible to pick a keeper.

Focus on your professional life and building wealth.

Family is a useless burden if you are living paycheck to paycheck. You don’t need $4 billion, but you do need $10k a month to support a wife and a couple of kids. Unless you plan living like the cast of Shameless, you also need a little real estate and back up asset. You really need abundance flowing to hold a family together. If you have to rely on her income, she’s going to be wearing the trousers.

Focus on your professional life and building wealth.

It can’t be stated enough. Unless you feel valued and successful as a man, and have something to show for yourself, how can you expect her to feel good about you? Imagine if all your paycheck goes on rent, diapers and school fees. Family is an accessory, an expense account that should be ‘pocket money’ to you.

Get ‘some’ experience with women.

But not so much you’re a jaded old player. Learning to be alone is just as important. An ideal time for a man to start thinking more long term is 35-40. She should be about 10+ years younger.

Sweep her off her feet

Soul Mates, Friends, I Love You – that’s for women. Let her think all that stuff. You don’t have a moment to lose. From day one you draw her into your world and her single life ends. Then you can decide if she’s a keeper or not. Just bear in mind that women are sometimes even more difficult to get rid of than they are to hook up with. Try not to leave a trail of wreckage in your wake.

Make sure she’s not hung up on sex.

It’s a sexual relationship so make sure she’s going to put out for you. Train her quickly in all your ‘marital’ requirements. Women are like puppy dogs—if you don’t house train them from day one, you’ll be in for a rough run. There’s no ‘payment’ for sex—it’s an obligation and it’s ‘good for her’. Oral and anal are a must because it teaches her to enjoy sex as a giver of pleasure, rather than because she feels horny.

Beware of hardened whores

The point of game is to consciously realize through practical experience, that women are not that important and are ‘two-a-penny’. You have to be like a surfer. Hop on the wave, but if you see the reef approaching, hop right off. If you break it off and she is chasing you, this is when you can really judge her and break her in (if she’s worth it). Women often pine after ‘exes’. To any man who’s in an LTR without kids and is not completely happy, or made a start based on ‘equality,’ cool it right off—today—just do it. You can thank me later.

Embrace her inner prostitute

All women enjoy being prostitutes, provided it’s done in the right way. By that I mean a woman who gives sex on demand even though she’s not immediately turned on. Inside an LTR there will be times when she ‘doesn’t feel like it’. Show her how to overcome that ‘frigid’ mood. It takes a virile man to get it on with a woman that’s rejecting his advances, especially when she’s his bitchy wife (all wives get bitchy). In my experience if you have trained her to perform, she will get surprisingly turned on, even though she started out cold. Don’t be fooled by the ‘honeymoon’ year. You have to use that time to train her so when sex starts going sideways, you don’t take no for an answer

Knock her up

An LTR = children. There are other advantages but kids are the primary feature. Think of her as your farm animal for breeding. You need to keep her productive one way or another. ‘The devil makes work for idle hands.’ If you can raise the budget for some home help or have parents on side, this will be vital when you have kids. If not, you will end up as the ‘herb’ maid by default. Family needs family. If you don’t have one you’ll have to manufacture one.

Keep your world private

Women will attempt to get under your skin and once they do they will invade. Don’t key her in on your financial matters, professional life, or personal friendships. Beware of divulging too much during pillow talk. Idle gossip seems harmless but it can be toxic. She’s trying to get you on lock down so you can’t come and go without excusing yourself. Fuck that. You have to get her used to your absences. Good women are ‘faithful’ (ie. they have faith in you). Good men are loyal. She has to have faith in your loyalty. She’ll get accustomed to you doing your own thing and returning to the fold.

Never cry on her shoulder

Find a male colleague, therapist, or lawyer to open up to, but never to a woman, least of all a wife. “I’m about to be made bankrupt and put in jail for 10 years on fraud charges” = “Had a bit of a rough day at the office, we’ll be fine.” The reason the wife waits 10 years for the jailbird husband is because she has faith in him. Her faith is misplaced, but it suits him just fine.

Let her cry on your shoulder all she wants

Make sure it always ends with her taking the dick, moaning like a banshee, and ‘feeling much better’. Never underestimate the power of frame followed by insertion of your ‘female adjustment tool.’ At the same time create boundaries so she has to behave.

Beware of friends

The walls have ears. As soon as a female is involved there’s a game of whispers. Be very wary about talking to your buddies, especially if his girl is likely to come in contact with yours. You have no control over what he says to her about you. This is why women often try to match-make your friends. They are trying to install spies in your camp. Always flirt and be appealing to her friends—you never know when you might need their intel. When you are married, game starts to extend into everything. Perhaps that’s why long term married couples are wealthier.

Plausible deniability

Even if she produces a 1080HD clip of you balls deep in a shemale, DENY IT. Brushing off all manner of gossip and shit tests is a vital skill that so many men lack. Don’t engage. Her approaches are not rational. The only time you cannot deny it is when she walks in on you in the flesh. Also remember that she might ‘feel it’, even if she is unaware. This can cause you a certain amount of turbulence. I’ve had an LTR tell me that she dreamed of me with another woman the morning I got home from a ONS. Women have a 6th sense and you better believe it.

Who lives by the sword dies by the sword.

Extramarital sex is generally best avoided. I have kept a woman on the side with positive results, but it’s like a coke habit—it can quickly get addictive, expensive, and destructive. There is a fine balance between being spineless husband and alpha asshole.

Is Family Worth It?

  • Children can be super cool, provided you have the spare time and cash.
  • The LTR woman has to be controlled, led, tolerated and taken care of. This is a heavy responsibility.
  • You can never show your weaknesses. You will only get small doses of her feminine support. Making an overdraft on those can be fatal.
  • There are other and possibly better ways to validate yourself, but as a man gets older he is what he can share with the world, not the sum of his selfish accumulations. A self-made ultra-alpha with $4 billion validates himself by family. He must know something.
  • Co-habitation has little advantage beyond having a maid. Peace and quiet is one of the most important and underrated commodities.
  • Family life can get real tedious and filled with boring and expensive ‘family’ obligations.
  • Having a woman under your roof is a great way to have instant access to sex, but it’s also a great way to have instant access to no sex.
  • Family is like a loaded revolver in a monkey enclosure—someone will eventually get wounded. If she is the one that takes the hit, you have to carry that off in a very controlled and polite manner.

Understand that a woman needs a man’s affection and attention. Unless you fancy another man balls deep in your baby momma, you will have to police her and take care of her for the rest of your life. That can be stressful and demanding. The upside of pulling it off is you have your own entourage, giving life a little meaning outside of chasing dollars and skirt. Keeping a woman in your orbit long term involves more focus, training and precision than a Bruce Lee movie, but it has its benefits.

The biggest mistake is probably made before you even start—getting into something you are ill prepared for is a sure fired way to fail. A bad family can be the loneliest, most soul destroying place on earth if you don’t approach it correctly.

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