It was a cool summer night. I wore a thin cashmere jumper my mom bought me for my birthday. At the bar I took steady sips of my caipirinha while talking to my two wingmen about our dimming prospects. And then I saw her. It’s a cliche to be drawn into a girl any guy would rate as beautiful, but then again my tastes are not particularly refined.
“She’s a 9.5,” one of my friends said.
“No, she’s a 9.” I replied. I had to bring him back down to Earth.
The problem with Washington DC is that it’s hard to get hot girl game practice. In a place like Argentina that’s all you get. Besides the occasional 8, most of what we deal with are 6’s and 7’s. They’re cute but with generic personalities they don’t make you want to quit the game and settle. In a land of 6’s I had to roll up with game. I had to be a dick.
She was with a group of eight other girls and I waited until she broke off from the main group. Before I went in I tapped the shoulder of one of my friends so he could witness the whole thing and praise my attempt if it warranted.
“Hey.”
She turned around.
“Let me guess… you are from… Argentina,” I said.
“Nope, guess again.”
“Italy.”
“Nope.”
“Colombia.”
“Nope.”
“Spain.”
“Nope.”
“I give up.”
“Bolivia.”
“Really? Cool, well, you don’t look bad, because Bolivia has the ugliest girls I’ve ever seen.”
“What?! My family is from Bolivia!!!”
“I mean…”
“How can you say that!!!” If she was any uglier the conversation would have been over, but she wasn’t. I fake backtracked.
“You must be from the east of Bolivia.”
“Yeah, so?”
“Sucre?”
“Yeah.”
“Well I traveled through the west, which was definitely very ugly. The east it a little better, especially the parts closer to Brazil.”
“It doesn’t matter!!!” She taps her friend and tells her I said that Bolivia has ugly people. Her friend is just as outraged. But she’s still standing there in front of me.
“Look no other guy knows Bolivia like I do. I was there for three weeks. In fact I have the parasites to prove it.” I put my hand on my stomach. Actually I was there for only ten days.
“Where are you from?” she asked.
Soon she grabbed both of my hands and we danced. I forgot what exactly what I said but I joked that things weren’t going to work out between us. I think because I noted her hair was shorter than mine. Then she made a comment about some boyfriend and thirty seconds later her friend pulled her away. I shined for six minutes.
The problem is if I see a 9 here I have to be at your best because there will be no other 9’s for weeks. It’s quite silly actually and the odds of getting one from a cold approach in this manner in this town are about the same as winning the grand prize in a scratch ticket lottery game, but it’s important to try anyway. Until I get out of this city it’s impossible to live up to my game potential.
I ended up getting a number of a 7.
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