PREVIOUS REENACTMENTS:

This latest reenactment happened at my favorite bar. The black teddy bear is Omar.

I’ve been hit on by quite a few gays in my life. Even though I have zero interest in homosexual relations, and am repulsed that a man wants to do activities with me involving either my anus or his, I’m still respectful and polite. I answer their questions but ask no questions of my own, and it usually only takes a minute for him to get the hint. No harm, no foul.

So it says a lot to me when a girl responds like a bitch when I try to start a conversation without insulting her. I don’t care how many lame guys tried to hit on her beforehand, or how bad her day was, or how far along her cervical cancer is, but if someone comes up to you in a nice manner, you should return the favor. It’s fine if you give one-word answers—I’ll get the hint in twenty seconds—but going out of your way to put me down shows you don’t even possess basic humanity. That type of girl would see a bleeding body lying on the sidewalk and not do anything because she desperately wants to fire off a text message to her friend that recaps the latest episode of Glee.

If I can treat gay guys with kindness, when I don’t engage in that anus lifestyle, there is no excuse for a woman to not do the same to a man who approaches her in a public place. The girl is free to act like a bitch if the guy is rude, but otherwise she needs to take a hard look at reality, which says that she has absolutely no worth to the human species besides her vagina. Pick any woman from a crowd of your choosing and I’ll bet $10,000 that she will not add a single drop of knowledge or wisdom to mankind during her lifetime. No woman does.

You don’t want to talk to guys? That’s fine, just don’t come out and expose me to your anti-social retardation. Stay the fuck home.