Delve with me into the lies women tell themselves. Ten little “clues” he’s not the one.
You know what I find fascinating about this? It really shows me that only men are capable of romantic love (much to their detriment). There’s no “thinking and analyzing stuff” (unless he is into game).
He either loves the woman, or he doesn’t. End of story.
Yet we must maintain the illusion there are soul mates. I love the backward rationalization of knowing that “he’s the one” from the get go. I wonder how many women have thought that and then been burned and rewritten their histories in their minds? Or said he’s the one and then two years later hate him?
It’s kind of like seeing a People magazine article about a celebrity couple and how much they are “in love” which usually means the nasty break up is about three months down the road.
And so the article starts, but how to tell if he isn’t a soul mate?
We’ll go through the lists with the characteristics that are Beta and Alpha.
1) The list. The mental list that every woman has in her head. If he has too many shortcomings for the list, he doesn’t make the cut. The word picky is synonymous for the word standards.
A man that cuts past the list is Alpha.
2) You don’t trust him. Good call, except the untrustworthy ones are the ones that excite you.
A trustworthy man is Beta.
3) You avoid conflict. How many women actually do this? This is actually advice for Beta men. If you can’t stand you’re ground, you can’t live. As Shakespeare said a brave man dies only once, a coward dies a thousand times. The Bard apparently knew plenty of men that were dying repeatedly at the hands of their wives.
Notice the woman encourages rational non accusatory fighting. I can count on the one hand the number of women that do this and have fingers left over.
A man that fights is Alpha.
4) He’s not a source of comfort. If only this worked, and didn’t get the man LJBF or thought of as Beta when he does.
A man that is an emotional tampon is Beta.
5) He’s an addict.
The man without addictions is Beta.
6) He’s not a good parent.
A Good father is Beta.
7) Long term goals are incompatible. This is an interesting one, because she brings up where they are living, for God’s sake. If a woman is so demanding that where she lives comes before love, she is incapable of love.
Any man that bends to the will of the woman is Beta.
8 ) Either he’s disrespectful, or she is. There’s a delicious irony on this one. How many women are respectful to their respectful husbands? Practically zero. It’s almost an either/or proposition.
9) No tingle. Note that if this one exists it beats out all the rest and if it doesn’t exist, making the other 9 will still not be enough.
Alpha.
10) The little voice in your head tells you he isn’t the one. Translation: He isn’t high enough status for her.
Alpha.
Now, like many women the ideal man is a mix of alpha and Beta traits, a lesser alpha or greater beta is perfect, but there are really a small percentage of these in the world.
Want to really know if he’s the “one” sweeties?
There’s really only one rule:
Will he stay around despite all your bullshit?
If the answer is no, then he’s not the one. If the answer is yes, then he’s probably the “one” even if you’ll hate him for it.
