By Mormon Man
Ever since high school I’ve been known as an opinionated and outspoken person. I come from a family where talking politics and religion were never taboo. Both my parents put a lot of time and effort into teaching us to understand those subjects instead of just going with the flow.
So it should come as no surprise that I’m not really very quiet about men’s issues when I’m with people face to face. I’ve been pleasantly surprised by how well a lot of this stuff has been received by family and friends; and have also been surprised to see that more women in my life than men have been willing to recognize the inherent problems with feminism and our modern gender dynamic.
One thing that seems to set off both the men and women I talk to, however, is the subject of Game. I was talking with my parents about it on Sunday night and my mom said she doesn’t like the idea of my dad constantly manipulating her to keep her attracted to him. I asked her if she thought her wearing makeup, keeping her hair clean and overall taking care of her appearance is a manipulation of my father. Her response struck me pretty well. She said:
“I do those things for your dad because I want him to have the best me he can have.”
I immediately replied that that’s what this blog and others in the manosphere are all about. Yes there are men online and in the world whose only concern is to bed as many women as possible or otherwise get what they can out of people; but most of us don’t function that way.
We use Game as a way to be our best possible selves. All people – both men and women are born with the inherent ability to recognize good from evil. Every single person, whether religious or not, is born with the ability to recognize the good and bad in people. Our actions and thoughts may stifle that ability, but most of us still have it and can subconsciously recognize admirable traits in others.
Women are attracted to men with Game not because they are manipulated, but because they recognize that men are being their best, most masculine selves.
Now obviously there are aspects of Game or aspects of the alpha male that are wrong or simply evil. These are not men being their best selves but a subtle twist and manipulation of men who are. A jerk is just a bad variation of a leader. A cad is the twisted version of someone who is socially dominant. A dictator is the mutation of a leader.
The PUA version of Game works in the 21st Century for two reasons. First, we don’t have very many real men anymore. With so many effeminate guys and perpetual man-boys, women will embrace any semblance of masculinity they can find; even if it is a twisted version of it. Second, the good aspects of masculinity are consciously frowned upon. As a result, women don’t actively seek out manly, leader-type men, they seek the gods of our day – guys who are like movie stars, artists and musicians. If both of these aspects were to change, the cads and players would have no chance with women. That aspect of Game only works with a civilization that is in a Roman decline.
However, the real foundation of Game –the idea that men and women are very different and that a man should magnify his masculine virtue is a godly attribute.
I have a friend who spent the last two months in Africa. We were talking today and I made a joke about her rationalization hamster. She asked me if I was still into the masculinity stuff and my answer was a solid yes. This stuff isn’t a phase once you find it out and are open to it. It’s a paradigm shift. It’s a set of tools that finally help men cast off what they’ve been programmed with all their lives and become the men and leaders they should be.
Other bloggers have talked about Game being a toolbox with things like negs, recognition of fitness tests, and an understanding of hypergamy as tools. Tools is all they are. Tools don’t make a man competent. A man is more than his instruments. However, they are a necessary part of getting any job done. Man has had tools since Adam because it helps him accomplish his goals. Is a man manipulative because he signifies his professionalism by wearing a suit to work? Is he fake because he uses a car to get himself to work? A man cannot be defined by his tools, but he can use them as a way to improve himself and his surroundings. And just like a car, a wrench or a gun, Game can be used for good or evil. The tool isn’t evil, but the man who uses it can be.
Embrace Game for what it is. It is not an end to itself. It is a tool to help men become Men. Eventually a man won’t need it because he will become it. That is the ultimate goal – to be instead of act. But until we reach that point, we need to use what we have at our disposal.
