The Black girls are obviously the most oppressed and the White boys the biggest oppressors, but the White girls have taken to arguing with the Black guys over which group is the most deserving. We know all the Black males cousins are rapists and pedophiles, and of course the White girls are all racists and secret KKK members. But which trumps which? Its impossible to know how to seat the family around the dinner table until we know the rankings. Any suggestions?

Oh, ya, we have two gays and one disabled, varying skin color and genders. Is there a chart or formula we can use to decide who's the most deserving?

And none of that crap about treating everyone equally and with respect as individuals, the White boys tried to pull that shit last year.