[using a throw-away acc] I was into bdsm and female degradation for several years. I figured I was simply accustomed to it via frequent exposure on the internet when I was a teen, as I would visit predominantly male pages (I wanted to relate when I had depression).
However now I think it is derogatory, even to someone who seems to enjoy it (me). I don’t like it and I feel disrespected, at the same time, I desire it. I want to move on from liking it, but it seems like I strongly enjoy milder things (like spanking or my face being held). Does anybody has any advice on how to “heal”? I do see some progress after I cut myself from toxic parts of the internet (insta pages etc)
Also, it seems like I kinda consider any sex derogatory to a woman, what do you think? It’s not that I think so, I just feel like that. (Therefore I am kinda asexual at the same time too...)
