How do I get the desire back? Missed opportunities to tell my last ex how badly she hurt me by cheating caused me to fade away. She will no longer acknowledge my message to her and of course everything between us is done. There was only one message to her and that was sent several years too late. We broke up almost a decade ago and I lost trust in bonding with another woman because she was so sweet. She was hilarious and had an even weirder sense of humor than me, which was a good thing and seemingly rare.

Several women, sex workers and other people from various podcasts/youtube videos etc. say that sex is a need. A man can have friends, family and a life full of love. You can love yourself and be happy without sexual relationships. The only thing keeping me from becoming more of a HVM for a new woman is wanting to. How do you force yourself to want it? I want to be convinced that making the ultimate sacrifice again is the right decision for me. It probably is not right for me but I'm still attracted to women. I think about connecting with a woman a lot of times but is it worth completely adjusting the life I built for myself? I feel like I'm stuck in limbo.

If I cannot connect with a woman on some level then masturbation is a better option. I never cared for one night stands or any other sort of meaningless sex. Porn became boring to me after I had good experiences.