Crosspost "My [29F] best friend [30F] of fifteen years is siding with the woman [30sF] who assaulted me at her bachelorette party this weekend. How do I move on?" from /r/relationships:

tl;dr I was assaulted at my best friend's bachelorette party this weekend and left with serious injuries including a broken wrist. My best friend has sided with my attacker because they are coworkers and she wants to "focus on the good and keep her career safe." I am devastated.

Chloe and I have been best friends since seventh grade. We have been close the entire time and have considered each other sisters since our children were born one right after another. We have never had a significant argument and almost always see eye to eye. In the rare instance that we do disagree, we are excellent at communicating our problems and resolving them immediately.

Chloe's bachelorette party was this weekend. There were about fifteen girls around the pool at the hotel and we were all having a great time. There was alcohol available but I can't drink in excess because of a health condition, so I had one mimosa early and called it a day. About an hour after the event started, Chloe's coworker Marissa arrived with her twelve year old daughter Daphne. Daphne was not invited; in fact, children were explicitly prohibited because of the nature of the event.

Chloe is a very nonconfrontational person and the rest of us didn't want to sour the day, so we did our best to keep Daphne entertained. Because I was the only sober one, I ended up being the one that was looking after Daphne while her mother began to drink heavily so that she could "play catch up". While I was irritated, I didn't want to make a scene. At this point, it had been about an hour since Marissa and Daphne had arrived and I realized that Marissa had disappeared. I told Chloe that I was going to find Marissa because we were supposed to be playing drinking games and had a stripper planned for later, and those are obviously not activities that I wanted to be babysitting an uninvited minor for. Chloe agreed and I left the pool.

I found Marissa in one of the cabanas at the complex's other pool with a man. I told her to finish up and come get her daughter because it wasn't my responsibility to babysit and she told me to fuck off, a response that I was expecting given how drunk she was. I waited for Marissa outside of the pool to make sure she actually came and when she appeared again about fifteen minutes later, she was clearly angry. She crowded me back against the fence and started yelling at me to mind my own business. I told her that I had had every intention of not getting involved but that it wasn't my job to parent her child at my best friend's bachelorette party.

That's about the last thing I remember. I must have triggered some deep seeded rage because the next thing I knew, I was flat on my back with people crowded around me. My ribs are deeply bruised, my face is rashed up from the pavement, and most seriously of all, my wrist is broken and will probably require surgery. Marissa left with Daphne before the police arrived and I was taken to the hospital in an ambulance.

This was two days ago. The police reports have been filed, DCF has been called by another member of our party because Marissa was slapping Daphne and pulling her hair on the way back to the car allegedly, and my life has been completely turned upside. My body feels like it was hit by a Mack truck. I cannot work (I'm a barista). I cannot clean my house or take care of my children or walk my dog.

Worst of all, however, is how Chloe has responded to all of this. Not only has she treated my injuries as if they're not as serious as they are, she has sided with Marissa and agreed with her that I shouldn't have "gotten into her business," and that is wasn't my place to decide what her daughter did or didn't need. She's also gone on to say that she thinks me pressing charges is selfish and the fact that I would endanger Marissa's career over "a drunken spat" is ridiculous.

Reddit, I don't know how to process this. My best friend has always had my back. She has always loved me and taken care of me. I am a clear victim here. Even if it wasn't my place to tell Marissa that she needed to watch her own child, attacking me is a crime and an insane response to being confronted. I know that this relationship is over. I know that the worst moment of my life is something that I'm going to have to remember without the knowledge that my best friend was there to help me through it. Every other girl that was there is on my side and completely in defense of me. When Marissa inevitably goes to jail for this, and subsequently loses her job, what do I do?

I can accept my fault here. I should have put my foot down from the start. I shouldn't have confronted Marissa. I shouldn't have been alone with her after she had been drinking. Why is this happening? What happened to my sweet, gentle, kind best friend?

Thank you.

Posted by eleanorbartlet | 30 April 2018 | Link