Whether this is your first time in the dating world or you are newly divorced and entering the dating world, there are some steps you can take to help guard against divorce. There are no guarantees and why not do everything you can to live happily ever after with that someone special?

Guess what: those superficial things you think are so important don’t hold a candle to these two foundations of a good relationship and/or marriage. Stop shopping for the right one with your superficial glasses. Put on your big person pants and let’s dig into some interesting conversations that have more staying power than “cute butt or sexy eyes”.

Developing an observer in charge of turning your mirror inward, I believe, is a key component of getting clear the offer you are and the offer you want as a partner. When you are in the blame game” “it's not my fault, it is everyone else’s fault” any partnership is going to have its limitations. Getting on a journey with your self requires courage, consciousness, feedback from a trusted advisor, vulnerability, insight, and the refreshing ability to apologize for starters. Knowing your strengths and challenges, competencies and incompetence, where you are a beginner and where a master, is the first step of this journey. Surrounding yourself with people who value this consciousness and are seeking it as well is refreshing. Clarity about who you are with all your foibles builds confidence and self-esteem and is very attractive.

Unfortunately, when people don’t take the time for a self-journey, they are at risk for blaming, hypocrisy, being judgmental, and insecurity runs rampant.

What do you mean a self-journey and how do I start?

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