My husband took a road trip and returned unhappy and basically told me how unhappy he was with our dynamic and our marriage. I also suspected he might have cheated at first as he mutually followed a bottle girl from a bar that he was partying at with his friends. I asked him and he said nothing happened and I do trust him to tell me the truth as he didn’t hold back on any thing else in that talk. Btw (37 m) I’m 33 f. At first I felt defensive, sad and heartbroken. One weird thing let to another and I found myself on this sub for a few days. The harsh reality has hit me that I have failed as a wife - he is an amazing provider, especially financially, a good father, and has many other great qualities. Last few years we have been in a rut due to some past trauma we both experienced which resulted in depression and ptsd (plus two kids under two). I pulled away sexually, became resentful, nag, passive aggressive, judgemental . Just someone probably so miserable to be with. I also have asperger’s so there are some communication issues, but I never let it be a crutch for my faults. I’m in great shape, take care of my hair, nails , wear feminine and sexy clothes so it’s not a physical thing - just my terrible personality. That being said I do take care of the house, the kids are always immaculate and super happy, I do his laundry, make meals and other things to help make his life better. I have done a complete 180 last few weeks (stfu, no nagging, happy attitude, sex 4-5 times a week). I am wondering if I should discuss, apologize for all my failures. Or just move forward and slowly ( hopefully) will see a change in him. He already has made comments how he finally feels close and has everything he could have wanted. He always tells me I am beautiful and I know he means it. I am trying to reconcile the guilt and shame of how I have been just been a pain to live with in so many ways. I can’t get over how much it hurt to hear him say how unhappy he is was. Do I just keep focusing on being the best I can be ? Or do I bring it up again ? Another thing that was a serious reality check is that as he’s aging he’s getting more successful and motivated. He could easily find a younger, hotter woman.