To begin, this post will be (very) lengthy, a TL;DR will be included. The account I am using is an older trash account; but the thoughts, questions, and story itself are all true. I'm here only seeking advice on an anonymous level, as I believe that people are most honest when there is nothing there to restrain them.

I'm your typical 'White Knight' Beta. I have been in a relationship with a girl whom when I met, was 14 and I was 17 (17 and 20 respectively now). I had just gotten out of a relationship where I was played like a child and cheated on, so meeting this innocent girl was grand. She had done little wrong, was a strong Christian, and had features which I found to be extremely attractive. Initially, I played uninterested, until after 2 weeks we hooked up. I went about talking to her about life, dreams, philosophies, etc. You know, 'deep' shit. Eventually, she was filled with a lust for me, and asked to have sex. It had been 8 months, and finally we came to such a point. I was her first, which I found to be outstanding, yet also a redeeming quality. Our relationship blossomed, with seemingly over-romantic antics.

While this quick summation seems grand, it was restrained by her parents. The age gap kept them from allowing us to openly meet, so we resorted to teenage ideas. Fucking in the school parking lot, in the school bathroom, on the bus during track meets, or even at my own house when we'd sneak off. This level of adrenaline, the sheer thought of being caught made it great. Even though it was few and far between, I received such a rush that it was outstanding. I personally believe she did as well, hence the fervor which she displayed during sex. The primal essence which seemed to exude from us both during sex really drove me forward. All of this seemed fine to her, this good girl who was finally doing lewd acts with an older guy. I was perfect for her, and although I am a Beta, in her eyes, I most definitely attained the status of Alpha.

Over the years it grew tough, and temptations arose. This was fine, as we planned our secret meetings on a monthly basis, engaging ourselves in the most crazed of locations. It was in our false belief of never being caught, that the killing blow was dealt. We met up as usual at a game, I was out of high school, but she kept me in the loop of when her parents would leave her at the football game to 'watch' her siblings. I picked her up, and we proceeded to a nearby graveyard which was far off the road, a place nobody would check. As we drove through the grey stone forest, I parked my car, and sat in the back seat. I proceeded to take off her top, all whilst slowly kissing her and nibbling on her neck. As my hands slid down her waist, slowly withdrawing her tight slacks to reveal what I really wanted, I saw headlights in the distance. I rushed to the front seat, naked and in a daze. As I went to start the car, police lights filled the darkness. Keeping my calm, I got out of the car. Pants unbuttoned, no shoes, hair messy, with a girl wearing only her panties in my vehicle. The officer got out, laughed and exclaimed "Can't you two find anywhere else to do this?" and let us off with a mere warning. Thank God! Yet, there were no thanks to be made, as the girl I was with was filled with a fear. As I drove her back, I knew that from this point on that her timidity would not allow her to take such a risk in seeing me again. The following day, she called me. She had decided that we should wait until she turned 18, and then she would see me again. We were together, yet any physical contact was gone.

Fast-forward to now, at that point we had 13 months until she was 18. Now, it is a firm 8. Contact has been kept with our phone calls using a 'secret' phone which I purchased for her, yet things seem amiss. Daily have I grown cold, ignoring texts, more concerned with the gym or my studies. Even more-so, have I found myself looking at other women with a lust unlike anything I've had. Yet, in my 'White Knight' ways, I have felt that I must endure, as what awaits me is surely my dream. This... This idea wasn't an issue until recent, until a girl I met really got my heart racing. A short Korean woman, firm breasts, a nice ass, and very intelligent with your typical 'smart girl' looks came into my life.

She had caught my eye during the first day of classes, yet I'd shy away. This was fine until a lab, in which I jumped the gun and began to flirt with her. We jokingly made bets on who had the correct data, to which, I was incorrect. She and I had bet a banana, so come next class period I gave it to her. As awkward as the idea was, her eyes gleamed and she smiled in a stunning manner. I managed to smile brightly and stare into her eyes to show that I was indeed, very interested. From that day on, a problem arose within my mind. Then, 3 days ago, I came home to a bag. My brother had brought this from his school, and in it was everything which I had given my current girlfriend.

To summarize, I had been dumped by my now 'ex-girlfriend'. I wasn't angered, just slightly shaken. The bag lacked the phone I had given to her, which was a clear sign this was all a game. We began to talk it over, and she cried saying I had changed and that she still wanted me. Yet, in my mind I had begun to pursue this new woman. I have been deeply conflicted as I desire both, but I know that I can't have both women. Yet, in the same light, I had recently found out (Facebook), that the Korean had a boyfriend. This confused me as she would always pass glances, and in our 3 solid conversations, she never brought him up.

TL;DR My question, to all of you, is should I stick it out with this girl I've been with for so long and invested all this time into? Or should I pursue a girl who is obviously taken, yet has displayed clear interest in me? Or, just maybe, decide that neither of the two are worth my time and be single for once in my life?