Do men just go around hitting on anyone and anything? Or is basic sexual attraction a necessity?
Sounds like a Stupid question and it probably is.
I always felt I was good looking but I think with social media and plastic surgery being common place, reality is throwing me for a loop and I’m really not sure anymore : plus I’m getting older now and it’s been a source of insecurity for me….. in any case, a guy who I would say was attractive or at least relatively so because he didn’t seem game-less and he seemed like he was confident in approaching women like he’s done it before and likely has some success with it…… he hit me up at the mall this week. I was very much in my own zone so I was not even trying to get any males attention. I was wearing leggings sneakers and a cropped hoodie so my butt and stomach were on display but I had no makeup on so I didn’t think it was that provocative and attention grabbing and now most women dress and show off their body a bit so it’s highly probable I wasn’t even single but the dude clearly just knew I was single or if I wasn’t he didn’t care……. Lol
Well I AM single and I was somewhat into him as he came on very very strong and I love that kind of dominance especially as I’m very cautious around ppl and not really the type to approach people socially on my own and especially not Men either. I’m outgoing but I don’t put myself out there with strangers unless it’s a work environment or somewhere where it would require me to approach someone but I don’t go to random strangers in public settings and try to talk to them for fun…. Ever
In any case, he seemed to be well connected and after telling me how Gorgeous he thought I was he asked me if I wanted to come to a party with him. He supposedly moved to my city (large city) from another large city in North America. I wanted to go but I just felt I wasn’t crazy about him and I didn’t want to feel like there was pressure to sleep with him afterwards. Also, no makeup and sneakers so I didn’t feel party ready either. I declined but got his number instead and gave mine.
We will see if he reaches out. Point I’m making overall is that I’m not sure if I should take it as a compliment that he approached me or think of it as an insult…… The manosphere stuff going on is everywhere and you can’t escape it but it’s shone a light on how men view women for me. I knew all this before I just never let it get to me plus I played by the rules and charged it to the game…,. but now I am finding that it has become more negative and made me feel more insecure and hopeless in my dating. having this content shoved down my face across the entire internet daily is now getting to me. Even though that guy seemed like he may have been genuine I have no idea what he was doing before I ran into him. Maybe he hit on everyone before me too and was just seeing what he could get. Maybe he sensed I was insecure and thought I was an easy target. Like this is all stuff I’m wondering and finding hard to date because of. Before I would just brush it off and not care but now it’s like I’m under a microscope and all men are plotting on me to use me or hurt me or why would I even try to put myself out there because they all won’t want me either if I’m not X Y and Z…… It sucked all the fun out of dating for me. Especially because I think I’m actually a cool person but if certain things about me are beyond my control then I’m fucked. Because it all could be actually possible. Am I being hard on myself? Because sometimes truth and non truth does intercept.
Anyways, His friend told him to hurry up with me when we were talking and he said “it’s worth it don’t worry” so maybe it was genuine but who really knows
He also could sense I was insecure about my body at one point cause I was tryna pull my leggings up and said “don’t worry you look amazing” so yeah, he’s not an idiot with women I just feel like I hope the attraction was genuine and he wasn’t preying on me or thinking I was an easy target. And this was maybe the nicest thing he said:
But…. The one thing he did say when I said I wasn’t up for the party was he gaslighted me with “why you so boring?”
So anyways am I genuinely being hard on myself or do I have a case for being worried?
Also how do y’all sense a women is single?? That’s another question I wouldn’t mind being answered. I think I know already, but I like gathering ideas
