"The Best Damn Thing" by Avril Lavigne "Let me hear you say hey hey hey Alright Now let me hear you say hey hey ho"

Okay, going well so far. No problems here. "I hate it when a guy doesn't get the door even though I told him yesterday and the day before I hate it when a guy doesn't get the tab And I have to pull my money out and that looks bad"

Oh okay, she's starting off strong. Why is it my responsibility to open the door for you? Are you unable to open a door? Splitting the difference on a tab is something that should be encouraged, why should I pay for your food/drink?! I honestly don't know how she could get worse than this.

"Where are the hopes, where are the dreams My Cinderella story scene When do you think they'll finally see"

Sorry hunny, but your Disney movie fantasies are NOT real life.

"That you're not not not gonna get any better You won't won't won't you won't get rid of me never Like it or not, even though she's a lot like me We're not the same And yeah yeah yeah I'm a lot to handle You don't know trouble, I'm a hell of a scandal Me, I'm a scene, I'm a drama queen I'm the best damn thing that your eyes have ever seen"

Ha. Okay. Being "a lot to handle" and "a drama queen" are basically code words for STAY AWAY. And you are definitely not the best thing I've ever seen Avril, not with this attitude.

"I hate it when a guy doesn't understand Why a certain time of month I don't wanna hold his hand I hate it when they go out, and we stay in And they come home smelling like their ex girlfriends"

Oh okay, so I guess it's fine to act like a complete BITCH when it's your time of the month. How about no. I can act like a reasonable human being 24/7 and I expect the same from you.

"I found my hopes, I found my dreams My Cinderella story scene Now everybody's gonna see"

That's great for you, but I feel bad for that man. "Give me an A (always give me what I want) Give me a V (be very very good to me) R (are you gonna treat me right) I (I can put up a fight) Give me an L (let me hear you scream loud)"

Ha, yes, because you should always get what you want. If you don't learn to compromise you're going to end up doing something horrible, like being married to the lead singer of Nickleback. Oh.

"One, two, three, four Where are the hopes, where are the dreams My Cinderella story scene When do you think they'll finally see"

Again. Fantasy

"Let me hear you say hey hey hey Alright Now let me hear you say hey hey ho Hey hey hey Hey hey hey Hey hey hey I'm the best damn thing that your eyes have ever seen"

Okay Avril, I hope you had fun, but this is the most misanthropic song I've ever heard. Have fun being married to Chad Kroeger.