hey, let me introduce myself, I'm a crazy person who broke up with his ex 5 months ago. even though I began very bluepill I slowly learnt stuff from here and dumped her cold with a redpill mindset. Started online dating, and got nothing but fatties, even though I had LOST 25KG since we met! It was my mistake, I can't say no to these whales and I'm way too nice, I liked the attention, I needed easy dates and I wasted a lot of time and got discouraged a lot.

So I bluepilled HARDDDDDDDDDDDDD, came crawling back a month later, but she met a dude and hit it off with him. Boy did I bluepill hard... She was torn, and all of my desperation drew her to him, and I did some crazy shit, she cheated on him with me, and it was a whole saga. They're finally starting to fall apart (your typical 3-4 month relationship) and I think it's run its cycle.

Anyway, I met a decent girl, I definitely get along better with my ex, in fact my ex and I we're perfectly suited, that's why she wants to try things. I think her idealistic behavior has rubbed off on me in that way and now I am so desperate to get back what we had, I pretty much dropped my whole life to make it work the last time, and I suspect the same thing will happen. Anyway, I broke up with my current gf to try things with the ex.

She says she's not in love with me anymore but she can 'learn' to love again, I am bluepilling left right and center. I'm extremely tense and desperate, and extremely forward, how the fuck can I stop doing this? How the fuck can I turn this into a redpill situation where she's interested in me again? All I can come up with is playing hard to get but the situation at the moment is so far from that. She's still 'friends' with the ex, and she could probably pander to his bluepilling shit too if she wanted too.

There are times when she's keen and times when she's not. And I think she is getting less and less keen. I am a desperate person with a background of rejection and loneliness. We're both crazy. I am the antithesis of bluepill, I have a mindset of "I don't want to be alone" and now it's "I need her." I know it's probably been stated again and again to just drop, but right now she wants to take things slow. I can't help myself but pander. She doesn't want to rush. I am bombing hard. I really hurt her a lot, messaged her bf about us cheating, the works, did some terrible shit.