I’m 25 years old, my first and last relationship was in high school. I got cheated on and dumped after nearly 4 years together, so it broke my little teenage heart. The damage from that affected me for a while, but I’ve moved on since then, and I’ve spent my time trying to become a better version of myself. I’m not rushing to get into another relationship. But I think it would be healthy for me at this point in my life, so I’m no longer avoiding it either. I’ve met women that have overtly claimed to be interested, but it never gets very far despite me pursuing it.

We typically end up having good conversations, lots of laughing, and there have even been some that I’ve had a lot in common with. But after a while I just stop hearing from them. I’ve been ghosted a lot, and I still don’t understand it. I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong. I exercise everyday, and I’d say I’m fairly average looking. I’m always masked in the pictures I post here, but they might give you a general idea of how I look if you’re curious. I make an effort to be polite whenever I speak, I’m very calm (which I’ve been told is scary…?), and I tend to think I’m being reasonable whenever I speak my mind. So, at least in theory, I should be easy to get along with.

I’m obviously not perfect, no one is. I have a lot of difficulty expressing emotions. I have them, I’m just not very expressive. I also have a hard time reading social cues, and my personality can seem a bit abrasive due to my honesty. I’m self aware, so I’m not a creep or anything. But if you combine my personality flaws, it can be easy to perceive me as an emotionless asshole. I try to compensate for that by being a better communicator. I fully acknowledge my issues, and I work to fix them. I’m far from the best option available, that’s fair. But clearly there’s a hamartia that I haven’t addressed, or that is just unacceptable, because people keep disappearing on me.

I don’t like to be misunderstood, so I’ll say it plainly. No one owes me anything, period. So I expect nothing from anyone. But I’d at least like to know why I keep getting ghosted when things seem to be going well. After all, it’s perfectly fine to admit that you just aren’t into someone. Recently, I’ve started to think that maybe I’m one of those people who are just meant to be alone. Like a hermit. I really hope not. But if that’s the truth, then I’m ok with it. I’m able to accept the realities of life, whatever they may be. I would like to hear your opinion on my situation though, and any solid advice would be appreciated as well.