Let me preface this by saying that I am by no means puffing myself up.

Ever since I started getting physically attractive, I’ve noticed a whole lot of strange things happening to me. I’m 23, black from South Africa, 6’1, 90kgs.

Naturally quiet laidback guy. Don’t really like talking to or being around people too much as it always leaves me drained. I just mind my own business and do my own thing. But what I don’t fuckin get is why people seem to be so concerned about what I’m doing!? Like wtf. People are way too reactive to me, maybe I’m just crazy and delusional but I see this shit unfolding almost everyday with my own eyes.

This only started happening ever since I started slimming down and getting leaner. I can’t deal with the unwanted attention, because this is all new to me, I have no idea how to handle it yet.

Yes I’m bragging, but I literally have women constantly glancing/staring at me, hot girls even, which makes me extremely uncomfortable. When I go clubbing, chicks hover around me, keep trying to catch my glance, I’ve had girls approach me and chat me up. They’re more open to me. Dudes also just stare at me, especially the older ones, like bruh...

It’s worse at work, noticed a lot dudes and some chicks are now hostile/jealous towards me, thank god this is a seasonal job and I’ll be done in December.

I’ve gained a lot confidence in the past couple of years. I dress well. Body language is on point. I’m a bit cocky with my body language sometimes . I don’t go around bragging to people or shit like that, I don’t even share my accomplishments. I know I definitely got some sticking points and need to tone down certain things and learn how to calibrate myself better and be more congruent with my new found persona.

I’m introverted but that don’t mean I’m a pussy. I can approach/talk to women, men. I’ve got a couple of notches under my belt. Have 2 fuck buddies at the moment that I bang multiple times a week, so I’m not desperate for pussy. Been feeling really overwhelmed, and the negative energy is starting to affect me. Guess my presence is very polarizing, people either dislike me or don’t, I can usually tell even when they fake smile at me and we have small talk.

I’ve been getting shit tested a lot, it’s like people are looking for chinks in my armor so they can rationalize that I am indeed “putting up an act/being fake”... This is amusing but very annoying.

Sometimes girls will just give me dirty looks but then I catch them just gawking at me, other times they try to make fun of me, laugh at me and make sure that I notice but then a while later they’re back to staring/glancing my way again.

How do I deal with this? I know I’ve got a long way to go, and a whole lot of things to learn/experience. I just wanna do my own thing and be left alone and not deal with this shit, “haters”, girls and guys constantly trying to test me. I’ve even developed some anxiety because of this, fuck.

Thank god I’m at least confident and can keep my frame sometimes, but other times it gets to me, hence this post.

Is this normal? How can I learn to better deal with this shit on my self improvement journey.