I’m depressed because of masculinity crisis

I’m a 19M and i’m currently undergoing severe depression. For context i grew up in a household with 3 sisters and though my dad was present I felt he was never as masculine as other male figures I’ve seen growing up. Long story short I try to find masculine guidance on youtube by watching people like Hamza and Andrew Tate. I watched the video linked here and became really emotional because It made me realize how much i’m lacking manly qualities. I blame my dad for that, it was his job to teach me how to be a man but how could he when he wasn’t one himself. I’m seeking support in this group, any ressources advice or if you want to connect i’m down. I really think my depression is linked to me being emasculated my whole life. Please help.