A desperate guy coming from a place of scarcity is a huge turnoff to women. Women want a man who is desired by others, and thus has options and is not the last pick of the litter.

So what to do if you are not already such a person?

Simple. Don’t telegraph it.

If you can stop communicating neediness and desperation via unattractive behaviors, women will often (even wrongly) assume that you must have an abundance of options, or at the very least not be living in complete scarcity.

By being unafraid to lose, you are much more likely to win.

It’s when you are not afraid to lose that you are completely free to act. You will speak more freely and honestly and not fear that what you have to say is either the wrong thing or not good enough. Women will detect this and on average find you more attractive.

Their logic goes as follows:

  1. This guy speaks his mind and is not just telling me what he thinks I want to hear in order to actively try to win me over.
  2. This guy must not be afraid of potentially losing the opportunity to be with me.
  3. This guy is not desperate and must thus have an abundance of options.
  4. Guys with an abundance of options invoke the principles of pre-selection and social proof.
  5. If so many other women like him, then he is likely a good choice that I should also consider.

Full breakdown on how to achieve abundance in dating.