I'm the one that set myself up as the friend. Instead of acting on the initial interest, I decided to be friendly and inviting so I could get to know her and see what I really thought of her. But ironically, by getting too close to her, I lost my shot. I achieved a point where she could talk to me about anything, and then suddenly, that became my only purpose for her.

My hospitable over-accommodation made our relationship one-sided. I am only "someone she can come to." I made myself just a convenient hug box should she ever need it.

But ya know what? There are two sides to a friendship too, and I no longer have the patience to lend an ear to someone who never cares to do the same. In this case, "I just think of us as friends" translates to me as "I kinda don't give a shit about you, but I hope you can still be there for me if I need to talk." No thanks. Have a nice life. You've been stranger-zoned.

In the future, I plan to assert my role, my position. I am to her who I display myself to be: Either someone who's interested, or someone who just wants to be there for them. I will be honest with myself and rise to the actions my intentions call for. NO ONE is going to pick up my hints or meet me halfway; I have to go after what I want, and do it before I fool myself or anyone else into thinking I want anything less.

Hope this is an okay place to say this, and thanks for reading. I'm really trying.