Gents of Seddit,

I usually sarge solo... with great success... but tonight I brought a gentleman friend of mine who has a natural ability with the womenz. It was ungodly amounts of awesome.

We went outside of my favourite Friday night bar, and there before us was a 2-set just dying to be approached. I smoke, and to smokers, thats an easy approach. I walk up and say "I hope those are xxx that your smoking" (xxx = the classiest smoke in town) they get kinda embarassed because they're smoking cheap cigarettes. I tease, I kino like a boss, and my wing occupies the less attractice of the two. After a few minutes of BOSS game, the queen bee -blonde, kinda looks like a huge bitch, hot by porn standards, but trashy by my standards- starts calling the name of the girl I'm gaming. She obligatorily walks toward her friend. I call her name and motion for her to come back. She does. We agree to meet up again.

Later on, I see the girl, she comes to me, grabs my hand, wants to talk / flirt, and the original girl my wing was occupying comes and takes her away by the arm... her hand slowly un-intwines itself with mine. I let her go and go play pool.

LATER I see the queen bee is gone, just my target and the HUGE cockblock. I see a major opportunity. I rush off to find my wing. I tell him I need about 2 minutes alone with my target. He comes along. I tell her the cockblock's name and to engage her. I approach. We have a few seconds. I kino, target kino's, I go for the number close. I have my phone out taking her number and the cock block SNAPS. "YOU ARE NOT GETTING HER NUMBER! NO! SHE'S JUST DRUNK, SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU" my target then wraps her leg around my leg and gives me the bedroom eyes. My wing tries to occupy the ugmo cockblock. Queen bee still no where in sight. I ask her what her last name is so I can at least facebook her. Cockblock MOVES BETWEEN US. She says "She has a BOYFRIEND. You CAN'T have her number... She doesn't need another guy calling her!!"

Please note: No boyfriend was mentioned all night by any party.

Girl keeps reaching for me hand. Girl and I keep locking eyes. I keep my hand on her back. I tell her if I knew she had a boyfriend I wouldn't have been hitting on her all night, or touching her the way I have, or wanting to make out with her so bad. She's dying at this point. Note: I love telling girls how if circumstances were different I would be making out with them / all over them / hitting on them - especially when its an artificial reason why we can't do it. Its sort of reverse psycology and its the best way to deal with LMR.

Me and my wing leave after I've established a strong attraction. Later, when the cockblock goes off to find queen bee, the target comes to me.

best part: My wing says to her "You don't have a boyfriend do you? You're friend was just saying that, right? She says yeah, and tells me she wants me to call her tomorrow. I take her number, Finally, god dammit, and we make out and do some heavy petting. My wing and I take off before the cock block army comes back.

We sneak our beers out of the bar under our jackets and go drink by the mall close by and smoke some fancy cigarettes and exchange high fives.

I know there is no F close here guys, but the point is, the thrill of the chase, that hot hot target, and overcoming not one, but two bitchy cockblocks makes this my favourite story in the last ... three weeks at least. Honestly, whats the deal with the ugmo cockblock? She's not getting laid so her attractice friend can't either because tonight is girls night? Go to hell cock block. I tried being civil. Queen bee too big of a bitch for anyone to handle? Go to hell too, queen bee.

This was my third number of the night, but by far the most game involved.

By your wingmen a drink, and learn how to wing for your friends.

TL:DR - my wingman is the only reason I got a smokin hot #-close and K-close tonight... Appreciate your wingmen and learn to BE A GOOD WINGMAN. Its a necessity in the cock block jungle that some clubs have become.