I fucked up and got friend zoned by a much younger woman in my social circle. For the past several months I have been playing 'male girlfriend' or 'play brother' as Alan Roger Currie puts it.

I can't give much in the way of details because specifics would out us both easily if someone we knew were to stumble on this in a google/reddit search.

1) It started innocent with just hanging out going to dinner once in a while and talking and a passion for a hobby we both spend a ton of time and money on that we want to be a life-style/career someday.

2) We are heavily entrenched in the same social circle. Many of the same friends, same hobbies, same church. Due to shared interests that neither would walk away from I have to see her several times per week.

This puts me in a really bad position because if she decides to burn me over being butt hurt I basically have to unplug from things I have a tone of time and money invested in and people I love - then move.

3) The way I got "friend zoned" surprised me. We were hanging out a lot, going out to eat, going fishing, riding places together in my truck, talking a lot about our hobby. People just assumed we were dating. Someone referred to me as her 'boyfriend' and she confronted me about it to assure me we are just friends. Her crush ("the one") is a guy who basically nexted her before the date was even over.

- The way I see it I have to back out very slowly so it seems like it just happened. We have to stay amicable and like there is nothing weird. I am looking for advice on how to do that.

- A very good and blunt friend of mine pointed out that this can't go on. She just seems like a cool chick having fun. I seem like the older hungry guy who can't take a hint he ain't getting no pussy from this girl who is happy to use him as a girlfriend with a dick. Talk about a slap in the face, ouch.