let me just start off by saying, i love the venue change concept. we went from having coffee to having pho for lunch and then back to my place. sounds good right? well, i couldn't even k-close.

me and this girl "met" over facebook. we had been excessive texting for four days straight, and maybe that was the death knell of any attraction that could have been because we were getting into intense "get to know you" mode. She's also 5 years older than me and I feel a bit immature and i'm always worrying about saying the wrong thing. but whatever. last night she suggested to get coffee with me and i thought, oh this is a good thing, she's making the plans, strong IOI. which in theory it could be except I didn't capitalize on it. I got so much escalation anxiety it wasn't even funny.

So we started off at coffee like I said. Discussion was primarily on the neighborhood we live in, our roommates, and music. I pretty much did one or two things right here. One was disagree on one of her favorite artists. The second thing was making a statement about how I feel a lot older than people who are older than me due to where I am in life, possibly framing her mind to see me as more mature than I am and some moderate value. But that's it. No sexual escalation. No kino. Not even a dirty joke.

We walked to the next venue together. Again, no kino. Hands to myself. Playing the fucking "altar boy" all the way there.

Lunch: more tame conversation. ONE crack about how I like women wearing yoga pants (she was wearing yoga pants).

Walking back to my place: no kino.

At my place: She's very impressed by my roommate's cat. We're hanging out in my room, listening to music, going through vinyl, playing with my lights. She stands up the whole time, not trying to nab a spot on my very inviting bed. No kino. After about 30 minutes I started debating touching her hand, she pulls the "oh look at the time" move to excuse herself to go home. I got a hug as I was showing her out.

Sedditors, it's fine to get the date. It's not even an issue; if she's even remotely interested, she'll agree to it. Venue changes are also good. But please, for the love of pete get some escalation in there. Don't be like me. Don't let her think you're a "good boy". You'd rather her reject your advance than to not advance at all.

I might have another shot at her on New Year's; we'll see. Maybe I can get a midnight kiss out of it or something.