This all happened a few hours ago. So I show up to my homie's apartment, I take a shot and a beer and the pregame transitions into the actual event. I knew probably 80% of the people at this party so I was well in my element and had a lot of mental barriers unblocked. I'm always very mobile at events like this, I like to go around and catch up with everybody, many of whom I haven't seen in months.

I'm in the kitchen pouring myself a drink and these two girls (HB8 and a 3) are standing in front of the stove right beside me talkin some bullshit, so naturally I started talking to them to see what was up. I exchange a few lines of bullshit (can't even remember what I said). The blonde HB8 is eye fucking the shit out of me at this point, and I'm doing the same shit right back. HB8 takes a couple swigs out the bottle of wine I bought. She tells me what she and her friend came with some guys but they left with some other girls despite the hb8 &3 having communicated that they were "down to hook up with them". Not a red flag, but probably a fluorescent orange. Sloot alert.

I start making my rounds again and end up sitting on the couch talkin to my other homie. HB8 comes and sits between me and the homie interrupting shit but at the same time making copious knee on knee contact with me. I'm starting to get a phat buzz goin and at the same time she's noticeably drunk. She asks me if I find this one girl across the room attractive, and then she asks me if I find her attractive (leading fuckin question probably some covert female pua tactics goddamn son). I don't care. I'll give her the approval. Bomb girl like that? Even if it was a shit-test, in the respective circumstances any response woulda passed but I figured an affirmative one would be more appropriately aggressive. Girl hits me with “hey so I don’t think I have your number”. No shit you don’t I met you forty minutes ago. Bombest girl that’s ever showed interest in me, hell yeah, I pass her my phone and she saves the contact in. She asks me if I drove to the party and what kinda car I drive almost suggesting she wanted to leave with me. At this point I know the drill. I can hit her with a line like "ay come take a walk with me outside for a bit" and scoop a kiss no problem.

But I don’t.

Instead, I get up and pour myself some more wine. As I was talking to my roommate who also at the party only 5 minutes after getting up from the couch I see the HB8 making out with some random dude.

I don’t know, I just felt like I wanted to get to know the girl a little better before I kissed her. I don’t think it woulda been satisfying to me. I didn’t feel too bad, I was just thought it was kinda wack that she would just bounce around between dudes like that no problem.

Alright so about an hour later I’m back to sittin on the couch, and again she sits down next to me. She puts her head on my shoulder (this girl prob has the gnar gnar spins at this height). Now I’m a slightly chubby dude (5’11”, 195lbs). Girl starts PINCHING my fat rolls while kinda hugging me laying down. WHAT THE FUCK. I embrace my own thickness confidently and am actively working to improve it but what the fuck. So I pull her hand away and she brings it right back LOL. At some point she leaves with her friends.

I’ll probably text her or call her to hang out. I don’t really judge her too much for hooking up with some random dude just coz I left her alone for five minutes while hammered. We all compensate for our flaws in one way or another in this life. Hopefully she’s down to kick it with me sober so I can see what she’s about. I just don’t want to deal with some superficial bullshit.