Like many of you, I'm overly caught up in learning how women tick, tips and tricks, mindsets, basically anything that can help on my seduction journey. Understand that it is a journey, sometimes with no end. It might be to find some 10/10 model you can have a family with, it might be just to enjoy yourself, it might even be just to become a better, more attractive person.

Years ago, before diving into a 3 year LTR which ultimately ended in a mulch-contident cheating disaster, I spend a full year in self development model, learning PUA tactics, audiobooks, every seminar and Youtube video I could download to my iPod. I probably have thousands of videos/audio on every seduction topic known to man - but I missed a huge point - FUN.

I remember meeting up with 3-4 guys, also introverted, just starting out. We'd go out to the top notch bars/clubs in our city, running around like chickens with out heads cut off. One approach after another, just to say we approached, with no real intention. "I'm getting better" we'd say, assuming the approach anxiety would fly away one day after we hit 100, 200 approaches. It didn't. We never got better.

After the intense breakup, I found myself back in the seduction community. I going heavily into lifting again, eating well, bought a GoPro and decided my life was boring. Started traveling, diving into hobbies. Eventually, I started going out again, solo, online, whatever. My cold approaches for daygame were better, but not good by any means. It was WORK to me. "I have to do X approaches during lunch hour." or "Just two more, I need to do this." Again, I was missing the point.

Months ago, I had some guy stop me on the street. He said I just had some hop in my set, not a care in the world, just trolling along. At that time, I was. I wasn't approaching, I wasn't hell bent on jumping every female office worker in the city. I was enjoying my music, the fall day, and didn't have any outcome dependance. He literally wrote down his number on a piece of paper, gave it to me, said he goes out a lot, and told me to give me a call if he ever wanted to hang out. No gents, he wasn't gay. He just saw a human out being awesome and wanted to associate with him. Period.

I realized today that you can a thousand approaches, but if your mindset is "This is just for practice", you'll never see much progress. I actually went out with a girl this weekend I met off of a cold approach. This was the only cold approach in the last 50 or so I actually had FUN interacting with. We laughed, joked, smiled. I got the number and immediate went back into "I must make this work" mode... see that word again? Work.

She was going dancing with her friends, invited me along. I went out earlier, started approaching rampage for practice. Then hung out with her around 1am. I wasn't in the dancing mood, I was in work mode. Even for our 'day 2' meetup prior to this, I was in attack mode - "I'll neg, DHV, say this, or that. I got this."... I wasn't in "Ha, let's just joke around and be an idiot" mode.

Needless to say, things didn't work out. There were other things at play, she had just broken up with her boyfriend of 8 months a few days before I met her. They're hanging out today in fact, in hopes of getting back together. But either way, it was a huge wake up call that seduction, approaching, and 'game' should be FUN.

I recall back that anytime I've had success over the years, I was having fun. I was enjoying myself. Enjoying the process, meeting someone, essentially being the crazy idiot I can sometimes be when I'm out of my head.

Have fun guys. We only live once.

Cheers.