I am going through a transitioning phase in my understanding of myself. I previously thought that I was an innately good person, and that traits that I've been labeled while approaching girls or just being upfront were external and exclusive from me, such as creep, loser, idiot, or anything else that is considered bad. There were times where I even tried denying that I was any of those things by moving myself away from pick-up, making excuses that the traits I was labeled was a result of approaching multiple girls, not because of who I am.

However, I started to re-evaluate what these all mean when really looking at myself. And the truth is, I am all of these things. I can be a creep, loser, fool, and all of the ugly things that I denied myself...so does that make me a bad person?

And the answer I came to was: yes and no.

I am bad in that those are considered bad by societal expectations and rules, but that doesn't mean that defines everything about me. I am a creep because I am a sexual being. I am a fool because I haven't learned about my ignorance and I'm in the process of learning. I am a loser because I am perceived as desperate by those who see me trying too much. But, looking another way, I can be seen as sexually confident, brave, and determined.

So, I have come to accept the negative that came with approaching girls, because that's the kind of person I am: a creep, but also sexually honest, a fool, but also learning, a loser, but unyielding.

I'm both good and bad---and at the same time neither. Because those definitions don't mean much to me anymore. They're all a part of me, one way or the other, and whatever consequences or circumstances created will come of it, I will take responsibility for it. I won't deny that I am any of those things, but rather I will own it.