When a pianist performs an improvisation should he care about how he looks or what the audiences think? No, he just focuses to the rhythm and melodies to improvise to them. Because if he cares of anything else he will lose the beat, lose the feel and fuck everything up. And then people will throw eggs and shit at him.

You fuck up because you don't care about the people or women you're talking to. You only care about what they think of you. You only care about their opinions on what you say or what you look like. You only care about your image.

So should you feel better about yourself to stop caring about what others think? Should you work on your self-esteem and respect?

Fuck no, because the problem is you CARING what you think of yourself. It doesn't matter if you feel good or bad about yourself. It simply doesn't matter! What matters is HER, the girl you are talking to. You focus on her and her only. Caring about yourself and you lose to ability to connect to her and the presense. You can't read her emotions, you can't get in her head and you can't get in her bed. Same goes with everyone.