I was listening to an Andrew Huberman podcast the other day - you’ve probably heard of him. He was diving into the topic of meditation, and what really caught my attention was this distinction he made between two types: interoceptive and exteroceptive meditation.

Interoceptive is what most people think of when they hear "meditation" - focusing on your breath, going inward. But exteroceptive meditation? That’s about tuning into the world outside you - the sounds around you, the light in the room, the way your clothes feel against your skin. It’s all about getting out of your head and anchoring yourself in your senses.

Huberman said something that hit me: exteroceptive meditation at times might actually be more effective for getting present than the traditional, inward kind. And that immediately made me think about real life approaches.

Because that’s exactly what happens when you do real-life approaches. You’re not sitting alone, spiraling in your thoughts - you’re out in the world, interacting, observing, reacting. You’re watching people, reading the energy, feeling the sun on your face, noticing her smile, the way she gestures, the vibe of the street.

It forces you out of your head and into the moment. After approaching even when I didn’t get a number or a date, I’d walk away from a session feeling energized, calm, and honestly, just happy. For a long time I didn’t know why - I just chalked it up to “good vibes” or “getting out of the house.” But now I realize: I was meditating. Just not in the traditional cross-legged-on-a-cushion kind of way.

Doing approaches in real life is like street-level meditation. You’re pulled into the present because you have to be - especially with the kind of spontaneous, environment-driven flirting I advocate. You're reacting to her, to that moment, to what’s really happening. You can’t be in your head when your attention is in the world.

And the benefits go far beyond just getting better with women. If you’re anxious, depressed, stuck in your thoughts - go do some approaches. If you’ve been avoiding meditation because it feels boring or too abstract - go talk to women in the street. If you want to build confidence, sharpen your awareness, or just feel more alive - this is your tool.

It’s not a magic pill. It’s uncomfortable. It’s messy. You have to face rejection, resistance, and discomfort. But that’s the price of presence.

So if you’ve been looking for a reason to start doing real-life approaches, here it is: you’re not just building your dating life - you’re rewiring your brain.