I realized I wasn’t being seen as a human being when I was told “we can have anything together”. But the moment I became vulnerable physically and emotionally I felt I was turning into a burden.

I received more joy and enthusiasm from her after I fixed something in the house, solved a problem, or did something useful. Not for who I was, for my soul, but for what I could provide.

I felt her love was only valid as long as I was useful and as long I have that capacity to love deep like ag child. And yes, I felt used. The moment I couldn’t keep delivering, affection and love seemed to slowly withdraw. As a man, you can’t allow yourself to be human, with all that comes with it, because vulnerability is too often perceived as weakness.

I didn’t wish for anything more than the acceptance that even a man, if he allows himself to feel, can experience emotions and human states. And when he goes through a difficult time and lets it show, he only needs the understanding of that fact. That a man is human, above all.

Authentic love can only be born between two people who truly know themselves, who are real friends before anything else, who don’t hide secrets and reveal themselves in full intimacy without being afraid of judgment. Between two people who respect each other’s solitude and still choose to stand side by side when life hits hard.

Love exists where two partners can communicate their limits, needs, and desires openly and assertively. Where actions speak louder than words. Where sex becomes a sacred experience. Where you can see your partner as a piece of God, where you feel gratitude for their mere existence, and where you can share silence without it feeling heavy.

We are not steps on someone else’s ladder. We are souls.