Hi everyone! Just wanted to give a little update. Feel free to read my prior posts if you want. The short of the long of it is that I discovered my wife had cheated on my in September of last year. Unfortunately, we had separated inside the home at the end of July so the writing was on the wall.

Well, I’ve been doing alright. Our divorce will be finalized here in a few weeks. I started off strong but settling in to new routines has been tough. Coparenting has been challenging but getting better. It’s really hard not to have the kids and it’s hard when I have them. I’m the only one doing the work when I have them so it’s challenging and I miss them when they’re gone. Overall, I think I’m a better parent than before. It’s really hard though when the kids are tired and they get upset about our new circumstances but there’s nothing I can do to control it. I just hold them and console them.

Mentally, I’m doing well. I’m way way better than where I was 6 months ago. However, I’m still not fully healed. I get days where I’m just sad or days where, when I look toward my future without my ex, it feels like I’m leaving something important behind. It’s a hard thing rewiring your brain such that my 16 year wife is no longer in my life outside of coparenting. Things aren’t as sharp anymore but it still hurts sometimes.

My ex was extremely up and down for a bit. She seems to be getting better too. She’s full on with a relationship with the affair partner. Wouldn’t be surprised if they’re married soon tbh. Good for her I guess. The hardest part is having somebody new involved with my kids. She’s been getting therapy and attributes a lot of things back to some unresolved trauma. It hurts because we could have worked it all out but here we are. I’m hopeful she heals and becomes a stronger person. I worry for the day she wants to reconcile; however, I dont think that will ever happen.

I’ve made a new friend and we have a lot of fun together. It’s light hearted and no pressure. It’s truly been a joy. All in all, i never thought i would be here but here I am. Nothing to do but be the best dad for my kids.