Hey guys,

tl;dr

Met girl at public event where I didn't know anyone. She might be interested/we exchanged numbers. She made an open invite to the group before leaving for anyone to come to lunch - I initially said yes, but then blew it off when I realized how far away the restaurant was.

Also she is interested in coming to a party I mentioned. Did I handle this well? How should I approach the situation of the party tomorrow night?

I spin poi & contact staff as one of the new hobbies I've been working on to expand my horizons and build my value. Today I went solo-dolo to a public meetup in the park where I hadn't met anyone before.

It went fairly well, I'm comfortable around these types of people ("hippies/flowkids/ravekids"). I met everyone who was there, exchanged info with a couple, and met this girl named Ashley.

  • I ended up as the central driver of conversation more than a few times and talked with everyone there at one point or another. This is when she first noticed me and asked my name. I waited a second after that, then asked for her name. She went to shake my hand, but then gave me a smile and came in for a slow hug.

  • I chatted with her for a minute or two but then went back to what I was already doing (practicing with my prop and talking to other people).

  • She gave me occasional positive eye contact/smiles in between our conversations, but nothing huge or super obvious.

  • I ended up talking about a party related to our hobby that goes on Sunday nights, which she had heard of before but never been to. I invited her to check it out and use that as a pretext to get her info (I'll hook you up with the details). I didn't have my phone on me, so I gave her my number instead. While she was still at the event she texted the number with her name.

Here's my real question and scenario:

Before leaving the park with her friend, Ashley made an open invite to everyone in the group to come to lunch. I answered pretty quickly that I would be interested. She and her friend take another 10 minutes or so saying goodbye to people, during which I am talking and hanging out just like I was before (e.g. not following/chasing/changing my behavior). As she was about to leave, she 'reminds' everyone that they are going to get Thai food if anyone wanted to come (like me for example). She was parked in a different area and I hadn't said goodbye to everyone yet, so I just yelled at her to text me the address of the restaurant, she said she would and they walked off.

She texts me the name of the restaurant, which I look up as being 35+ minutes away. I had expected the restaurant to be closer and was kind of waffling as to whether I wanted to chase this girl all the way across town.

4:05pm Hey it's ashley :)

4:20pm It's called Thai restaurant of "x"

~4:35pm I call her, no answer. Text right after.

"That's the one in "x"? Thought you were going somewhere close, i've got other plans so catch you later"

4:50pm Lol ok yeah I guess

4:51pm Let me know about the thing - it's called [party]?

5:05pm [Actual party's name], [thisname] is the host

5:06pm I'll txt you if it's on for tomorrow

1

Did I handle the lunch situation reasonably? Should I have gone across town to get lunch with this girl? I feel like that may have been chasing too much/over investing, but on the other hand it was a pretty chill vibe all day and why not go get lunch with some hotties I just met?

2

Now that I've given you the above scenario which is in the past, here's a new one that's in my future.

She is interested in this party which may or may not happen tomorrow night. This is a regular party I've attended several times based around flow, music and general partying. I do not know the host or core group very well, but they know me by name and I come around every now and then. I've made a handful of friends and many acquaintances from this particular group of people, but don't have particularly high status there.

If they are hosting tomorrow, how should I carry myself if she shows up at the party?

Obviously my text will read something like: "Hey here's the info for that party I'm going to" and not care if she comes or not because that's what I'm doing anyways.

But if she does show up, how do I handle it? Do I try to scoop her into my orbit/frame and introduce her to everyone I know? Do I just say hey, what's up and then let her break away to do her own thing? Something in between probably. Anyways, advice is welcome.