Just wanted to add my story here. I was kind of beta in a relationship for around 9 years during my 20’s before discovering TRP, started more alpha and gradually got more lazy and complacent in abandoning abundance. Never was stupid enough to get married or have a kid, luckily, I knew that much and passed several big marriage shit tests. I embarked into a long distance relationship(ha) in the last year of our time together. During this time, I realized all the faults in my life that needed immediate attention, while I also became severely depressed and lonely, relying on my kind of girlfriend for emotional support. I was just beginning to understand the self improvement needed that I know now. When she needed it, I sent her thousands of dollars in guilt money for me deciding to move away (I now call this my alimony which makes me feel better that it was so little compared to the real thing), which she gladly accepted in exchange for the charade of caring about me. Needless to say, I was at my lowest, and even though I was beginning the long trek of self improvement neglected for more than a decade, I blindly concluded I needed to be with her because I could find no one else (had not yet discovered game or TRP and had no good redpill role models). So, on the eve of my return to be with her, I discovered she had entirely secretly and without so much as a slight change in character begun a new relationship for a year’s time without my knowledge. When I asked her about this, she called him a sucker (she’s approaching the Wall and needed betabux). Of course, when I was back in town during that year, we had hooked up, which I’m sure her new guy does not know. Not only that, within a few months after I returned permanently, they got married, I shit you not. We have no mutual friends, I found out online a few weeks after it happened; my feelings were mixed, some oneitis, some disbelief, some panic that she’s no longer a serious option for the future, but also some relief that it wasn’t me and that even though she was a great lay and familiar person, I knew enough that she wasn’t even close to wife material, nor was I close to husband, and my beta behavior had worked in my favor by pushing her away at this point even though it felt like a loss. So, as you can see, I’ve fluctuated between beta and alpha pretty significantly, I kept this girl and had great sex any way I wanted it with all sorts of dirty shit for a long time without marriage, but in the end oneitis crept up on me and she branch-swung to a loser who would give her marriage (with another alpha on the side I’m sure, sometimes it was me when I wasn’t a sad sack of shit around her). She did, however, respond to my texts after her marriage, putting me in the future alpha batter’s box, but I think I’ve honestly rode this train far enough and could do better with new prospects now that I’m absorbing TRP like a motherfucker, approaching, lifting, improving my career, etc. Strange ride but I thought it would be an interesting read.

Lessons Learned:

  1. If you show weakness that is constant, you are asking for trouble with women, and really, it shows something unaddressed within your relationship. In my case, it was a lack of abundance mentality that really caused weakness.
  2. Don’t get married in the West.
  3. Women are masterful deceivers with no loyalty and you will never know what they do unless you randomly uncover it yourself, even if you think you “really know her” or “she wouldn’t do that”. This sounds hateful, but it is 100% truth.
  4. The moment you change your life for her is the moment she changes her life for one without you.
  5. Do not rely on your girl for emotional support. Once in a while, ok, but constantly - forget it. Men’s clubs have purposes, not to be sob story time, but to help absorb negative feelings and turn them into positive activities. I will be looking for a good one.
  6. Oneitis is the enemy of feeling good about life.

Hey thanks for checking this out, felt good to get it off my chest.