Hacking Charisma -- /.

bsutansalt · 2014-03-27T16:41:33+00:00

The comments are quite blue pill (hence the flair), but the concept of execs learning what amounts to pickup is what I found interesting.

[deleted] · 2014-03-27T20:29:06+00:00

Interesting article. If you do a Youtube search for "Olivia Fox Cabane", you'll find some of her talks. As the article mentions, it's a compilation of stuff from self-help books, so your mileage will vary depending on how many self-help books you've read and how likely it is that you'll change your behavior because of something you read in a self-help book.

Olivia’s coaching style is not for everyone. She has a gift for identifying her clients’ social weaknesses, just as she once identified them in herself. When something really irks her—a simpering tone, breathy uncertainty, poor posture—she says she cannot help but take immediate action. Since Olivia has honed her social awareness, to sit and do nothing would be to endure the social equivalent of nails scraping on a blackboard. Her critiques are harsh, but an expected part of the process when she coaches a private client, who pay up to $100,000 for six months of unlimited access to Olivia’s advice. Before she agrees to work with a client, she usually ensures that he or she is open to this brand of critique. But on days like today, when her feedback is unsolicited, the reactions are not always positive.

“It’s about a fifty-fifty chance that they won’t take it well,” Olivia said when I asked her about it after the talk. “Half the time people end up loving the honesty. The other half of the time, they see it as plain awkward.”

It's not surprising that some people take it hard. It's hard to be an adult and have to hear these things from a stranger. You should have got that feedback in childhood and adolescence from parents, teachers, or friends. This feedback might be stern and parental - stand up straight, look people in the eye, don't fidget or mumble; it might be a quiet word from a friend - don't take this the wrong way, but ... ; it might be gentle mockery from your social group - there you go again looking at your shoes when you're talking - as a way of showing that it's ok, it's surmountable, and nobody thinks it makes you a bad person; or the feedback might be not so gentle if your "quirky" mannerism or social blind spot rubs the wrong person up the wrong way, it might be humiliating at the time, but at least you learned your lesson when you were 13 instead of 30.

One reason she has an adult market is that she's dealing with a generation who were denied those learning opportunities - overprotective parents, too much concern with short-term "self-esteem", not enough opportunities for freestyle social interaction where kids can get their rough corners smoothed down.

throw8way0 · 2014-08-22T12:37:08+00:00

bsutansalt, this is throw8way0. Enjoy the orangered. It makes a nice change to the red.

Title	Hacking Charisma -- /.
Author	bsutansalt
Upvotes	7
Comments	3
Date	March 27, 2014 4:40 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/21ilsm/hacking_charisma/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/hacking-charisma.230621 https://theredarchive.com/post/230621

Comments