Im new to TRP. Like 2 weeks new. I dumped my controlling abussive girlfriend and started fresh. In two weeks ive hooked up with 3 girls. Sounds good an all, except tonight is the night the pill actually hit me.

I went out with this girl, she is 10 years older than me. Im 20 and she is 30, i met her on okcupid. I message her and she suggeste we meet. This seemed weird to me at first, i put in little effort for a date. So we meet up and talk. Before hand the blue pill me was trying to justify why she wanted to meet me. For example "maybe she just wants to be friends" etc... but red pill me knew that this is crazy talk and she truly wanted to fuck.

So aswe are talking she throws a couple of shit tests. Ask me how many girls ive been with and instead of trying to beat her test i went blue pill and lied, said only two. I should have gave a response such as "too many to count" Anyways things went well. I knew she wanted to fuck and we did. Except i wasnt even into it, and she was in control the whole time. After reviewing everything and thinking that i had did good i realised that i did bad. She gamed me. She took me out, shit tested me, made me go into beta mode, told me what positions to fuck her in and how to fuck her...everything. i didnt realize this when it was happening because all i was thinking about was sex. I was blinded.

But i do realize is that i could have said anything in response to her shit tests and would have still fucked her while also feeling alpha afterwards. I cant belive i was so stupid and blind. Next time, if we meet again things will be different, because i am now seeing the actual truth.

I write this for my own personal reflection and also to help and new learners out there. Listen to what is being said here, dont let your beta self take over you. Say fuck it, and dont be afraid to hurt feelings.

Excuse any grammar errors, im on my phone.