23 years old with an associates degree in pharmacy and recently certified tech still living with family(mother and sister). Right now I’m feeling kinda stuck, I’ve been lifting everyday seriously consistently since June(was lifting beforehand but not tracking etc).

I’ve got an n count of 1 and I’ve been dealing with ED with several girls the last “breaking up” with me cause I couldn’t make it happen sexually which I wasn’t mad about but I was and still am frustrated by tbh. Worst part was we worked in the same building and she’s with this tall lightskin model mf now which is kinda funny but still sucks lmao. Honestly people think I’m killing it as far as getting pussy and I’ll just stfu to maintain that imagery but it just reminds me I’m not living up to my potential in this area. Anyways I think I pretty much psyched myself into a monk mode because I wanted to fix the “internal” shit so the external can work right but I’m just in a rut.

I know I’m improving physically because I get more random compliments in person and validation from girls when I post gym progress pics on Snapchat. At this point I want to be on my own from the family but I know damn well I don’t have the means to support myself and living with other people from what I’ve seen is awful(could be skewed).

In a nutshell I want to kill the beta and be actually fucking because the cycle I’m in is sexually frustrating (no fap/no porn).