So I copied this from a post I made elsewhere, but this is my dilemma.

I have been dating online for the past 6 years on and off. (Mostly on)

I always put I want a monogamous relationship.

I have tried every major free dating platform, I have either been banned for no reason (tinder, Facebook dating, grindr) or had really bad luck.

The men are as follows:

mostly just overly sexual right away in initial messages on the websites or very soon after we start texting.

they appear to pretend to want a relationship and will take me on a date, but then the overly sexual behavior will start on the way bringing me home.

if I do have sex or give in they pull away quickly or disappear completely. Or they try to put me into a friends with benefits scenario.

I have found a few who want a relationship:

They are always either VERY physically very unattractive to me. To the point where there is 0 physical attraction on my part. 0 chemistry. I can overlook someone not being my ideal of "hot", but these guys are usually REALLY bad.

Or I get the nice guys. The one's who seem great, but are doing everything they can just to get sex out of me. They will do even everyday errands, take me to appointments, take me grocery shopping, etc. But if things don't get sexual, they get mad and start being oddly mean as fuck.

Lastly the ones I usually end up with are the crazy / abusives. My ex boyfriend was really physically attractive, was a great partner in every single way. But he abused me mentally and financially, sometimes physically. We were together on and off for 7 years.

This pattern has continued with each man I seem to get to like that isn't just plain disgusting looking.