Things were never easy for me growing up. I was diagnosed with Nonverbal Learning Disorder very early in life. NLD completely alters the way you learn and interact with people, so socializing was an uphill battle for me.

Things took a turn for the worst when I hit middle school. As my condition made my school work suffer, I was given many different accommodations to attempt to help me out. These mortified me, as I didn't want to be stigmatized by my peers. So I withdrew from as many social situations as possible. So as puberty hit, I was completely unable to talk or interact with the girls I was suddenly becoming interested in.

My parents didn't really help either. My dad is a pretty beta dude himself, and never had the balls to give me the talk. I learned about sex from Google, after being tired of having no idea what my friends were talking about.

Whereas the NLD killed my human interaction, the increased verbal skills led me to develop skills as a self-proclaimed "cyber-pimp." I took all the things I didn't have the stones to say in person, and sent them to girls on chat rooms and dating sites all around the country. I was sent countless nudes from girls who I didn't have to talk to, and had a couple internet girlfriends in high school. I couldn't figure out though why I couldn't make it work in person.

My senior year, I finally got my first real-life girlfriend. And oh lord did the beta pour out of me. I backed down in every fight we had. I constantly let her boss me around. I was so happy to finally have an actual girlfriend, I figured it was something I had to put up with. The only thing I got out of the relationship was that I didn't have to graduate high school as a virgin (made it by 3 days).

We didn't last long after I went to college. I don't know if she cheated or not (she probably did), but I know for a fact her and another guy were showing interest in each other while we were still dating. We broke up in October of 2010. The rest of my freshman year of college was spent locked up in my dorm room playing video games.

My sophomore year, I joined my college's drumline. I met a girl there, and fell head over heels. After leading me on, she told me she just wanted to be friends. I got oneitis really bad. I was completely unable to function. It was made worse soon after. She started finding heroin needles in her apartment, and I had an open room in mine. I invited her to take it, somehow thinking this would change her mind. On the contrary, she started dating some guy 10 years older than her. He would visit, and I would have to spend my evenings listening to the love of my life get railed.

Finally, after over two years of the same oneitis case, a friend of mine posted a link to a Return of Kings article on Facebook. I read it. Then I read the whole website. And then I found /r/TRP. I took everything in I could. I got over all the oneitis and all the beta tendencies. It was life changing. The main thing it gave me, was that I was able to embrace my NLD for the first time, after denying it all my life, without using it as a crutch.

Basically, my TRP journey is still in its infancy. I have so much to learn and put into action. I'm working out vigorously this summer. I have one semester of college left, and I plan to use it to put all this learning into action. But regardless, I'm happier, I'm more confident, and my oneitis is history.

Socializing will always be an uphill battle for me. But TRP is the first thing that's ever given me hope.