So basically I went to college yesterday morning to teach first year students psychology practical. My professor is busy so I volunteered. I taught them last week too, but they weren't impressed.

So I decided that today I am gonna do good.

I had a great time teaching them. I am very awkward socially so I saw it as a great chance to brush my social skills. I acted clueless at times and I know some of them found it weird and laughed at it, but I knew that I am not gonna regret. Basically I paid attention to everything around me, tried to understand everything that was happening. Looked at each student and made sure that they were following me. At the end of the class the students were talking to me casually, so I knew that I had gave them a feeling of familiarity. They weren't shying away, I mean. It was supposed that my classmates would volunteer too but I did the whole thing by myself and it was satisfying.

After that we just hung out and most of my jokes were landing. It was pretty fun. A girl said that I am a bit too self depricating. Not all of my jokes are funny, but I try to keep them sensible and not random. I actually am diagnosed with Schizoaffective disorder and sometimes I make a lot of loose associations but as of now I am reasonable thanks to my meds.

So basically I am feeling way too wired. Like the whole time we hung out it was very fast, lots of jokes and information and trying to make jokes out of information, and I am kinda replaying the whole thing in my head and thinking what would have been funnier or Ironic. We also talked politics and shared opinions too. So basically it was exhausting experience. But a lot of fun nonetheless.

I am not able to quiet my mind down and focus on now. Like I am not getting rest. My brain is analysing everything. Usually this leads to bad stuff. I am not sure what to do. I think I will find time to talk to my psychiatrist. I have been getting high, it helps me relax, but it is not relaxing me enough this time.

Do you guys ever feel this way?

How do you calm down?