Hey, I'm 20 years old, university student. Lately I've been having some thoughts about not putting myself first and I can feel something inside me that I'm not happy about. Maybe because I'm not being my true self. I would love to hear how you guys deal with what you think and how do you act around people. Personally, I'm pretty ruthless, others could say that I have no emotions (I do have), but on specific circumstances I would do everything in my power to put someone on their 'knees'. Let me give you some of the real-life examples from my own life and I would love to hear your opinion on how should I deal with that and if I'm right/wrong.

  1. First situation. This morning, my roommate gets up a little bit earlier before me and rushed to work. Before that, he uses my mixer (no problem) to make himself his breakfast. He takes my last banana (I intended to use it for my breakfast), uses my peanut butter (the last spoon of it), eats from my bowl and leaves it dirt and goes to his work. I wake up and can't eat my breakfast.
  2. Few days ago, when I was chilling my roommate managed to damage a bath's pipe. He was so dumb he couldn't cut the main water supply. He immediately asked for my help and I stopped leaking water. If not me, he would have drowned himself and my neighbours. I took towels and cleaned water from the floor. I put the towels in the shower and drove my girlfriend back home. When I came back, my roommate was sitting in front of computer and didn't even take care of the wet towels or just make clean after he broke the pipe.
  3. Toilet paper, trash bags, my roommate haven't bought it himself, I always buy those things.
  4. In 6 months, he hasn't ever cleaned the bathroom, shower, kitchen. I always to that.
  5. I said that we don't smoke in the flat. He didn't care. When my anger built up, I said it's the last time I'm smelling cigarretes in my home and I will not tolerate it any more. Now the smoking has stopped.

I might sound like a little bitch. I was always think about others before doing something, but for my roomate, I see that he doesn't think about others, only about himself. How do you deal with that kind of person, how do I show him that he will listen and follow my rules. I don't like conflict, but I feel like I'm going to explode and holy shit then I will bury him.