This is sort of a rant, a problem I feel like a lot of men cope with. I'm not offering a solution, it's more like broaching the subject. First post, bare with me.

Recap on SMV for the newbies: http://illimitablemen.com/2013/12/13/understanding-social-market-value/

Indeed, SMV is very contextual and relative. Your perceived SMV (which is the default) depends on the context you're in. However, some of us (narcissists, bèta's who were lucky to score a much higher SMV woman in the past, ..) seem to feel their perceived SMV is not in line with their actual SMV (they perceive their own SMV to be higher than their peers). (But what is actual SMV? Actual SMV is, to me, still context based. For instance, in the times of the Romans, obese women had a higher SMV (signs of wealth/health) than skinny women.)

Let's call the SMV 'build up' (which is different for every individual) the SMV formula. I can see a lot of men (and women, of course, since they're entitled to a high value man that is masculine, muscular, makes a ton of money, blablabla) whose SMV formula is a bit skewed.

Let's take a look at extreme examples:

  • pedophiles: they are attracted to children

  • bestiality: attraction to animals

  • necrophiliacs: ...

A less extreme case would be the case where someone sees their own SMV to be higher than the one that is perceived by others(are these narcissists?). An example of this is Elliot Rodger.

Anyways, these differences in self-perceived SMV and perceived SMV cause different phenomena. Let's assume that if someone has a higher SMV (according to your own SMV formula), you're attracted (sexually attracted if she's the gender you fall for).

Case 1: partners see each other as higher SMV

Each partner is attracted to one another, ideal situation for most (although their are benefits to being with someone of lower SMV).

Case 2: partners see each other as 'the other way around' (1 higher SMV, 1 lower SMV)

If both partners know this and are satisfied, ideal situation. However, in most cases this leads to divorce (e.g. bèta bux, male adultery)

Case 3: partners see each other as lower SMV

No relationship. E.g. forced marriage?

The problem I'm broaching would be a skewed (or non context aligned) value formula, where your self-perceived SMV is higher than your perceived SMV. In this case you're most likely to end up in case 2 or 3.You feel like you deserve more, resulting in frustration, ..