Hey there,

I'm a 34 year old, in shape, financially independent man living in the most expensive city in North America. Vancouver, Canada.

Over the last several years I've taken the time to study and really listen to the murmurs of men, and women, across the internet about what exactly brings us happiness and security these days. Happiness seems to stem from independence, mostly, and security from being about to disengage from any relationship without a legal or financial penality.

Of course, everything about the system we live under wants to prevent most men, and even women, from being secure or happy. I recently finished a novel that I wrote, that encompasses much of my personal experiences with dating, tempered with the concerns and war-cries I've heard echo across the internet.

If someone would ask me to sum up modern relationships and dating, I would reply with: Bellum omnium contra omnes

I originally posted this with a link to my book trailer, but I was flagged as spam immediately, so I'll refrain from offending your sensibilities.

I'd like to raise the discussion on how I'd stopped actually dating, and how well it actually works to just "hang out."

I'm much happier, and sex is not a problem to get.

Many of us out there are now dating, but not dating. I wanted to come up with a new term for it, something along "journeying," which denotes an unfenced relationship. Why would any of us fence our partner in for anything short of reproduction?

It's tough in so many areas of life for young men these days, relationships and loving shouldn't have to be over-complicated in an age of unbiquitous sex and freedom.